IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 7

Today, the high sales of popular consumer goods reflect the power of advertising and not the real needs of the society in which they are sold. To what extent do you agree or disagree? You should write at least 254 words.

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The high sales of popular
consumer
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goods
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 today are often attributed more to the influence of advertising than to genuine societal needs. I largely agree with
this
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 perspective, as advertising significantly shapes
consumer
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 preferences and creates artificial desires.
However
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, it would be simplistic to ignore the role of actual demand entirely. Advertising has become a powerful tool for businesses, employing psychological tactics to foster a sense of need among consumers. Through repetitive messaging, celebrity endorsements, and emotional appeals, advertisements convince people that they need certain products to enhance their lives, even when these items are non-essential.
For instance
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, luxury
goods
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,
such
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 as designer clothing or high-end gadgets, are marketed in a way that emphasizes status and identity, encouraging individuals to purchase them to feel a sense of belonging or accomplishment.
This
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 manipulation often leads consumers to prioritize branded items over practical needs.
Moreover
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, advertising tends to create trends that people feel compelled to follow, regardless of the product’s intrinsic value. Seasonal campaigns, influencer marketing, and targeted online ads reinforce the idea that acquiring the latest products equates to happiness or success.
Consequently
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,
consumer
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 demand for these items rises, not because of necessity but
due to
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 the perception crafted by persuasive advertising. That said, some
consumer
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goods
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 do
fulfill
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fulfil
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 genuine needs, and advertising simply makes them more visible. Products that promote health, safety, or convenience,
such
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 as eco-friendly packaging or essential home appliances, serve real purposes even if they benefit from promotional efforts. In conclusion,
while
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 advertising undoubtedly influences
consumer
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behavior
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behaviour
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 and drives demand for unnecessary
goods
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, it is not solely responsible for high sales. A nuanced view recognizes that both advertising and actual needs contribute to
consumer
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 purchases, with the balance often tipping in
favor
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favour
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 of the former.

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task achievement
You might want to provide more specific examples or data to further substantiate your points, especially when discussing the role of genuine demand.
coherence
To enhance the clarity, consider restating your main argument briefly in the conclusion to emphasize your stance.
task achievement
Try to explore a specific example of a consumer good driven by real need and advertising influence to vividly illustrate your point.
content
The essay provides a balanced view by acknowledging both the influence of advertising and the role of actual demand.
coherence
Logical structure is maintained throughout, and each paragraph contributes to the overall argument.
cohesion
Clear topic sentences help guide the reader through your arguments, ensuring easy comprehension.
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