IELTS Writing Correction Service /
Writing Samples /
Band 4

Your local council is considering closing a sports and leisure centre to save money. Write a letter to your council. In your letter -Give details on how you and your family use the centre. -explain why the centre is important for the local community. -describe the potential effects on local people if the centre closes.

#council #sports #leisure #centre #money #-give #-explain #community #-describe #effects #people
Dear Sir/Madam, I am writing
this
 letter that relevant closing a sports and
lesure
Correct your spelling
leisure
center
Change the spelling
centre
show examples
. We always have
been
Unnecessary verb
apply
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used it for exercising and
enterteriment
Correct your spelling
entertainment
sush
Correct your spelling
such
 as swimming, basketball and football.
useing
Correct your spelling
Using
this
 leisure
center
Change the spelling
centre
show examples
very
Add a missing verb
is very
show examples
conveniant
Correct your spelling
convenient
 for
we
Correct pronoun usage
us
show examples
.
this
center
Change the spelling
centre
show examples
very
Add a missing verb
is very
show examples
 important for
Correct article usage
the redise
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redise
Correct your spelling
precise
 community because of
that
Correct determiner usage
the
show examples
 shopping, watching and exercising for some people
which
Correct pronoun usage
who
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liveing
Correct your spelling
living
 here.
We
Add a verb
We are
We were
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 very upset, because closing
center
Correct article usage
the center
show examples
potential
Change the word
potentially
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effects
Correct your spelling
affect
show examples
very
Correct pronoun usage
us very
show examples
 badly like people's
sport
Fix the agreement mistake
sports
show examples
 will decline,
unheathy
Correct your spelling
unhealthy
healthy
 increase and on
other
Correct article usage
the other
show examples
 hand, people's very alone. we always face serious
defficalty
Correct your spelling
difficulty
such
 as heavy traffic and air
pullotion
Correct your spelling
pollution
. Yours faithfully, Mohsen Ijbari
Submitted by jingelbing on

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Coherence and Cohesion
To improve coherence, organize your ideas in a clearer structure, ensuring each paragraph focuses on a single point or argument. Logical transitions between sentences will help the flow.
Task Achievement
Clarify your points with more specific examples or details, and ensure that each part of the task is addressed comprehensively.
Task Achievement
Focus on reducing grammatical errors in your writing and make use of more varied vocabulary to enhance the tone.
Coherence and Cohesion
The letter includes a clear greeting and closing, showing an understanding of letter format.
Task Achievement
You have identified the importance of the center to both your family and the community.

Word Count

IELTS says that you should write a minimum of 150 words in writing task 1. If you go under word count you will lose marks in task response.

A very long letter will not give you a higher band score.

Aim for between 160 to 190 words in writing task 1. This will ensure a concise letter and will be realistic in terms of time management. You have only 20 minutes to write the letter and you need around 5 minutes of planning time, so you will not be able to write a long letter in 15 minutes.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

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