Public transport should be funded by the government so that it can be free for people who use it. To what extent do you agree or disagree？
Some
people
believed
that Wrong verb form
believe
Correct article usage
the government
government
responsible for the Add a verb
government is
government was
avability
of public transport. In Correct your spelling
availability
this
essay
I will explain two reasons why I agree Add a comma
essay,
to
Change preposition
with
this
statement.
On the one hand, free public transports
have many advantages for the
society so the government should allocate their budget to it. Correct article usage
apply
First
benefit of public Change the article
The first
transports
is that it Fix the agreement mistake
transport
help
to reduce traffic in important parts of the city. Change the verb form
helps
As a result
, it would reduce the time needed to travel from one place to another and it could help people
to allocate their time better. Secondly
, electric trains could decrease the carbon footprint that
Correct pronoun usage
which
also
lead
to better air and Change the verb form
leads
environment
. Correct article usage
the environment
And
Correct word choice
Lastly
lastly
, by using free buses or trains, people
does
not need to spend their money to buy a car or motorcycle so they Change the verb form
do
could
spend it Wrong verb form
can
for
Change preposition
on
another matters
. Replace the adjective
another matter
other matters
Thus
, it is important for the authority to make free public transports
as it could raise Fix the agreement mistake
transport
people
willingness to use it.
Change noun form
people's
On the other hand
, mass transports
built by a private Fix the agreement mistake
transport
company
might lead to a big problem. The lack of regulation will leave the company
to set the price as they please without the consequense
of giving sufficient security and good facility. Correct your spelling
consequence
consequences
For example
, once in my hometown in Indonesia, there was a public transport operated by small
Add an article
a small
company
called 'Angkot', a modified car enough for 10 to 12 passengers and serve
short trips. It has Wrong verb form
serving
pricing
problem that keeps on Correct article usage
a pricing
raising
. Correct your spelling
rising
Besides
, there are no serious solution
to solve its Fix the agreement mistake
solutions
thieves
problem as the Change noun form
thief's
thieves'
company
and the authority didn't care much.
To sum up
, public transportations have economic and environment
benefits for society. It Replace the word
environmental
is
Change the verb form
also needs
also
need full support from the regulator as being controlled by private sectors is not favourable.Submitted by ru.kabiru.biru on
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introduction
Work on developing a more engaging and elaborate introduction to capture the reader's interest.
examples
Provide more detailed and diverse examples to strengthen your arguments further.
language usage
Ensure consistent use of verb forms and subject-verb agreement, such as "people does not" which should be "people do not."
structure
Your essay has a clear introduction and conclusion, effectively framing your arguments.
structure
The body paragraphs are logically structured and each supports a clear main idea.
content
You have done well to address both sides of the argument, acknowledging potential issues with privately funded transport.
Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Examples make your writing easier to understand by illustrating points more effectively.
Examples, if used properly, not only help you get higher marks for ‘Task Response’ but also for ‘Coherence’.
When giving examples it is best to put them after your main idea or topic sentence. They can be used in the middle of supporting sentences or they can be used to start a new sentence. There is no rule for where exactly to give examples in essays, logically they would come after your main idea/topic sentence or just after a supporting sentence.
Linking words for giving examples:
- for example
- for instance
- to illustrate this
- to give a clear example
- such as
- namely
- to illustrate
- take, for example
Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+
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