Some parents think children should do exrracurricular activitues. Others think thus will add pressure. Discuss both views and give opinion
Some people think that
after class
Add a hyphen
after-class
activities
should be done by Use synonyms
children
, Use synonyms
others
believe that Correct word choice
while others
this
method will Linking Words
stress
Use synonyms
children
. In my opinion, I believe that giving Use synonyms
children
Use synonyms
extra curricular
will help in developing Add a hyphen
extra-curricular
children
’s character.
On the one hand, some parents think that Use synonyms
children
should do extracurricular Use synonyms
activities
after school, and I agree. Use synonyms
In other words
, by giving Linking Words
children
extra Use synonyms
activities
, Use synonyms
children
will acquire much knowledge as long as it is not academic. Use synonyms
For example
, studies in the US proved that students who attend extra Linking Words
classes
learn much more than students who are studying academically because academic Use synonyms
classes
give them Use synonyms
stress
so they can not perform well. Use synonyms
Hence
, these extra Linking Words
activities
are crucial in order to develop Use synonyms
children
’s Use synonyms
skills
more efficiently. Use synonyms
Furthermore
, attending extra Linking Words
classes
will improve their character and their Use synonyms
skills
, Use synonyms
such
asLinking Words
,
social Remove the comma
apply
skills
, numeracy, and literacy. Use synonyms
This
is because they are going to study new things that will not be studied in schools which are going to be incredibly useful during their journey of life.
Linking Words
On the other hand
, some people say that it will Linking Words
stress
Use synonyms
children
, in a way that they will not be able to study anything else at all. One reason is that Use synonyms
children
are already overloaded with their homework and tasks that ought to be done, so Use synonyms
children
will feel lost in thinking Use synonyms
what
to do in their time Change preposition
about what
instead
of studying. Linking Words
For instance
, many schools in Japan refuse to give Linking Words
children
extra Use synonyms
classes
because Use synonyms
children
have the right to enjoy their childhood but surprisingly they found out that Use synonyms
children
who do not have extra-curricular Use synonyms
activities
perform better in their academic studies. Use synonyms
Therefore
, Linking Words
children
should not be given extra Use synonyms
activities
owing to the fact that they take their freedom and Use synonyms
stress
them at the same time.
Use synonyms
To sum up
, Linking Words
although
people may vary in their opinion, I think that extra-curricular Linking Words
activities
help Use synonyms
children
gain knowledge and improve their Use synonyms
skills
.Use synonyms
Submitted by s_syedy on
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task achievement
Ensure your introduction clearly presents both sides of the argument, as well as your position, to leave no ambiguity for the reader.
coherence cohesion
Make sure each paragraph develops one clear main idea with adequate support, connecting all arguments smoothly to one another.
task achievement
Consider including a brief acknowledgement of any potential counterarguments to strengthen your discussion essays.
coherence cohesion
You have successfully included a conclusion that summarizes your position and the arguments discussed.
coherence cohesion
Your essay has a clear and logical structure, with distinct paragraphs for each main point.
task achievement
You've provided relevant examples to support your points, making your argument more persuasive.