It is too expensive to look after and repair old building. This money should be spent on building modern building instead. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this opinion?
In recent years, the number of old
buildings
in urban areas has been increasing, which is one of the serious issues the local authorities have been facing. There are some voices that the local governments should spend their public money on building modern architectures
Fix the agreement mistake
architecture
in stead
of looking after and repairing old Correct your spelling
instead
buildings
. I strongly disagree with this
statement. This
essay will take up this
issue and elarborate
Correct your spelling
elaborate
elaborated
the
author's opinion.
First of all, Change preposition
on the
according to
a survey on the reasons why many local governments opt to preserve old architectures
in their areas, more than 70 per cent of all respondents state that they promote the conservation of those outdated Fix the agreement mistake
architecture
buildings
to keep their traditional ways of building alive. If they quit spending public money on conserving such
kinds of buildings
, this
will lead to the lost
of traditions. Replace the word
loss
Thus
, I strongly disagree with the statement mentioned in the introduction part.
However
, there should be a counter view that if we do not stop providing financial supports
with Fix the agreement mistake
support
such
buildings
, the amount of financial resources that we need for the maintenance of them will keep increasing. In addition
, other people would say that we will suffer from a lack of space for building a
new Correct article usage
apply
building
if we do not start to demolish outdated ones. But, we should consider the importance of traditions as well.
Fix the agreement mistake
buildings
To sum up
, the growing number of old buildings
has been one of the serious problems in urban areas. Although
some people state that the local governments should take
use of their public money to build modern Correct your spelling
make
buildings
, in terms of preserving traditional ways of architectures
, I strongly disagree with the former idea.Fix the agreement mistake
architecture
Submitted by m.kiyosu1997 on
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task achievement
Try to include more specific examples or case studies to strengthen arguments. For example, mention specific cities or buildings that have benefited from restoration.
coherence cohesion
Consider addressing potential counterarguments in a separate paragraph for better clarity, and then refute them with stronger evidence.
coherence cohesion
The essay has a clear introduction and conclusion, effectively framing the discussion on old versus modern architecture.
task achievement
The main point about preserving traditional ways of building is supported by survey data, which adds credibility to the argument.
task achievement
The explanation about the importance of preserving traditions is elaborated with logical reasoning.
Fully explain your ideas
To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).
For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:
- Paragraph 1 - Introduction
- Sentence 1 - Background statement
- Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
- Sentence 3 - Thesis
- Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
- Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
- Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
- Sentence 2 - Example
- Sentence 3 - Discussion
- Sentence 4 - Conclusion
- Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
- Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
- Sentence 2 - Example
- Sentence 3 - Discussion
- Sentence 4 - Conclusion
- Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
- Sentence 1 - Summary
- Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
- Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation
Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.