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Writing Samples
Band 7

Some people do not eat meat and fish. They think that it will better for health and also world. Discuss the the view and give you opinion.

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In recent years, there has been a growing trend toward vegetarianism, with many
people
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 choosing not to consume
meat
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 and fish.
This
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 choice is often based on the belief that a plant-based
diet
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 benefits both personal
health
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 and the global environment.
While
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 some argue that a balanced
diet
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 inclusive of
meat
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 can
also
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 be beneficial, I believe that adopting a vegetarian lifestyle offers significant advantages that cannot be overlooked.
Firstly
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, one of the most compelling reasons
people
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 avoid
meat
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 is the potential
health
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 benefits. Numerous studies have shown that vegetarian
diets
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, which are typically rich in fruits, vegetables, whole grains, and legumes, are associated with lower risks of chronic diseases.
For example
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,
people
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 who follow vegetarian
diets
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 tend to have lower blood pressure,
cholesterol
Correct word choice
and cholesterol
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 levels, and reduced risks of heart disease and type 2 diabetes.
Additionally
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, plant-based
diets
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 are often lower in saturated fats and higher in
fiber
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fibre
show examples
, which can support weight management and
overall
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 well-being.
Secondly
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, reducing
meat
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 consumption can significantly benefit the environment. The
meat
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 industry, particularly beef production, is a major contributor to greenhouse gas emissions, deforestation, and water pollution. By choosing plant-based foods,
people
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 can decrease their carbon footprint and reduce the demand for environmentally harmful practices associated with
meat
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 production.
Furthermore
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, fish populations worldwide are depleting
due to
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 overfishing, which has severe consequences for marine ecosystems. By opting for vegetarian meals, individuals can help conserve these ecosystems and protect biodiversity.
However
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, critics argue that a vegetarian
diet
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 may not provide all necessary nutrients, particularly protein, vitamin B12, and iron, which are abundant in
meat
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 and fish.
While
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this
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 concern is valid, these nutrients can be obtained through alternative sources or supplements. Many plant-based foods,
such
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 as lentils, beans, nuts, and fortified cereals, offer adequate amounts of protein and essential nutrients.
Therefore
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, with careful planning, a vegetarian
diet
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 can be nutritionally complete. In conclusion,
while
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 both vegetarian and non-vegetarian
diets
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 can offer
health
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 benefits, I believe that choosing a plant-based
diet
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 has more positive impacts, both for personal
health
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 and the environment. As awareness grows, shifting to vegetarianism could play a vital role in promoting a sustainable future for all.

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Coherence and Cohesion
While your essay is well-organized, consider using a few more linking words or phrases to ensure even smoother transitions between ideas and paragraphs.
Task Achievement
Make sure to address potential counterarguments in a bit more detail to show a comprehensive understanding of the topic.
Coherence and Cohesion
You presented a clear introduction and conclusion, both of which effectively summarized your position and the main points of your essay.
Task Achievement
Your essay provides a thorough discussion of the benefits of a vegetarian diet with relevant examples to support your points.
Topic Vocabulary:
  • Plant-based diet
  • Chronic diseases
  • Greenhouse gas emissions
  • Deforestation
  • Water consumption
  • Mitigate climate change
  • Natural resources
  • Animal welfare
  • Humane and ethical choice
  • Healthcare costs
  • Sustainable farming
  • Legumes
  • Fruits and vegetables
  • Vegetarian
  • Vegan
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