Today, the high sales of popular consumer goods reflect the power of advertising and not the real needs of the society in which they are sold. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

#sales #consumer #goods #power #society

It is being argued that these days, the growing requirements of common commodities show the art of promotions and not the true demands of the community where they are marketed.

However

, I totally concur with

this

idea because of consumer

behavior

Change the spelling

behaviour

show examples

and the chance

of providing

Change preposition

to provide

show examples

more detailed descriptions of goods in

advertisements

. The main reason for my agreement with

this

opinion is

over using

Correct your spelling

overusing

show examples

culture. Not only do

advertisements

try to shape new desires among

people

, but they

also

make

people

feel that owning certain goods enhances their status, happiness, or convenience. Even when the product is not essential, advertising uses a lot of tricks to make consumers feel they need it

that

Correct pronoun usage

which

show examples

often leads to impulsive buying decisions.

These

Fix the agreement mistake

This advertisement

show examples

advertisements

bombardment makes

people

buy their products to feel satisfaction.

Consequently

this

powerful impact often makes

people

purchase items based on trends rather than their needs. Another reason for my agreement with

this

proposition is room for more description. Advertising allows companies to describe their products more and better. It is possible that

people

do not need those products, but

that

Correct word choice

apply

show examples

advertising makes

people

feel

this

need. The more

advertisements

exist, the more description comes as follows. A clear example is gadgets.

People

have experienced life without them and felt no need for them. Yet nowadays, smartwatches have become very common

due to

the need for various data

such

as health information.

Subsequently

, new needs are shaped by making

advertisements

. In conclusion, to reiterate I agree that the high sales of consumer goods point to the impact of advertising and not the actual needs of society in which they are traded because of consuming manner and the opportunity to offer more details. Should

this

trend continue, it could have detrimental impacts.

Submitted by benyaminzademoradian1378 on Fri Nov 01 2024

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task achievement

Ensure the essay remains focused on directly addressing the argument in the topic. Avoid straying into tangential discussions.

coherence cohesion

Use more cohesive devices or linking words to improve the flow of ideas within paragraphs.

coherence cohesion

Make sure each paragraph distinctly focuses on a single main point, clearly supported with evidence or examples.

introduction conclusion present

The introduction clearly presents your position on the topic, setting a strong foundation for your arguments.

logical structure

The essay maintains a clear structure with an introduction, body paragraphs, and conclusion, aiding overall readability.

relevant specific examples

Relevant examples are used to illustrate the points, which strengthens your argument.

Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

Examples make your writing easier to understand by illustrating points more effectively.

Examples, if used properly, not only help you get higher marks for ‘Task Response’ but also for ‘Coherence’.

When giving examples it is best to put them after your main idea or topic sentence. They can be used in the middle of supporting sentences or they can be used to start a new sentence. There is no rule for where exactly to give examples in essays, logically they would come after your main idea/topic sentence or just after a supporting sentence.

Linking words for giving examples:

for example
for instance
to illustrate this
to give a clear example
such as
namely
to illustrate
take, for example

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7Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
2Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
6Grammar mistakes
 

4 paragraphs

292 words

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 5.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 5.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 7.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

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Today, the high sales of popular consumer goods reflect the power of advertising and not the real needs of the society in which they are sold. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

Rich people are getting richer, and poor people are getting poorer. What are the causes? What can be done to reduce this gap?

Some peope believe that longer prison sentences are the best way to decrease crime while others believe that there are alternative ways to decrease crime. Discuss both views and give your opinion.

In a number of countries, some people think it is necessary to spend large sum of money on constructing new railway lines for very fast trains between cities. Others believe the money should spent on improving existing public transport. Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.

The majority of news is being reported bad news such as wars famines, accidents and crime. Why do you think that is? Do you think news should be balance of good news and bad news?

Many people believe that social networking websites such as FB and Instagram have had a huge negative impact on both individuals and society. To what extent do you agree or disagree?