Nowadays, a growing number of people with health problems are trying alternative medicines and treatments instead of visiting their usual doctor. Do you think this is a positive or a negative development?

#people #health #alternative #medicines #treatments #doctor #development

✨ Do you want to improve your IELTS writing?

In recent years, certain individuals who have health issues and using other options of medicines and

treatments

Use synonyms

are growing. Before, they usually visited their doctor. I think

this

Linking Words

is a negative development and I elaborate on the following essay.

Firstly

Linking Words

, some

people

Use synonyms

instead

Linking Words

of visiting a doctor use

herb

Fix the agreement mistake

herbs

show examples

cure

Use synonyms

themselves.

However

Linking Words

this

Linking Words

alternative medicine

such

Linking Words

as herbs are unknown and even if some of them are useful for

treatments

Use synonyms

their side effects are unknown.

For example

Linking Words

, in Iran, many

people

Use synonyms

use these herbs to

cure

Use synonyms

coronavirus

while

Linking Words

these do not

cure

Use synonyms

such

Linking Words

problems

Use synonyms

and the side effects of them create

problems

Use synonyms

for them.

Secondly

Linking Words

, some

people

Use synonyms

assert alternative treatment like

yoga

Use synonyms

is secure and

people

Use synonyms

do not scare them.

Although

Linking Words

I accept

this

Linking Words

, only these

treatments

Use synonyms

do not

cure

Use synonyms

health

problems

Use synonyms

and are just good for helping with the first opting

cure

Use synonyms

strategy like visiting a doctor.

For instance

Linking Words

yoga

Use synonyms

is so useful for the human mind and they need to visit psychology

besides

Linking Words

this

Linking Words

treatment, they go to

yoga

Use synonyms

. In conclusion, nowadays,

people

Use synonyms

for

cure

Use synonyms

their health

problems

Use synonyms

do not visit doctors

instead

Linking Words

use other options like herbs or

yoga

Use synonyms

cure

Use synonyms

themselves and these

treatments

Use synonyms

are insecure and insufficient. I think

this

Linking Words

is a negative development.

Submitted by mkhdermani on Sat Nov 02 2024

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

structure

Your essay should have a more structured introduction and conclusion to strengthen your argument. Although the introduction sets the stage for your viewpoint, it could be more defined by clearly stating what you'll discuss.

content

Try to provide more developed arguments and examples. While you present some ideas, elaborating on them further with detailed examples or explanations could add depth to your essay.

cohesion

Make sure each paragraph has a clear topic sentence and smooth transition to the next. The essay reads slightly disjointed at times. Varied sentence starters and conjunctions could improve the flow.

task

You have successfully pointed out two main reasons to support your idea that the development is negative, which shows you understood the task requirement well.

conclusion

The conclusion effectively summarizes your opinion and restates your main points clearly.

Word Count

IELTS says that you should write a minimum of 250 words in writing task 2. If you go under word count you will lose marks in task response.

A very long essay will not give you a higher band score.

Aim for between 260 to 290 words in writing task 2. This will ensure a concise essay and will be realistic in terms of time management. You have only 40 minutes to write the essay and you need around 10 minutes of planning time, so you will not be able to write a long essay in 30 minutes.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

11
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
5
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
1
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 5.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 6.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 8.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 5.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

210 words

🚀 Prepare for IELTS writing section today!

Unlimited Task 1 & Task 2 checks
Practice with essays, charts, and letters.
Personalized suggestions & mistake analysis
Spot every mistake and boost your score.
Topic ideas & vocabulary helpers
Expand your ideas and use the right words.
Progress tracking
Watch your writing improve with every practice.

Topic Vocabulary:

alternative medicines
treatments
positive development
negative development
health problems
usual doctor
access
personalized approach
holistic well-being
lack of regulation
evidence-based research
proper medical treatment

What to do next:

Look at other essays:

7.5
band
Do you think the advantages of online shopping outweigh the disadvantages?
There may be divergent views regarding whether the benefits of online shopping outweigh the drawbacks. While some people think it has potential disadvantages, I am convinced by the view that online shopping is advantageous to customers and society.
6.5
band
Some people believe that art, such as painting and music, does not improve people’s lives, so the government should not spend money on it. To what extent do you agree with this statement? Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge and experiences.
There is a saying that art, such as painting and music, should not be included in the government budget because it does not improve the life of the population. This essay strongly agrees with this statement, and it is going to demonstrate how it is a lot more important for a government to spend most of its funds on citizens’ basic needs, such as healthcare, education, and public transport.
6
band
A government has a responsibility to its citizen to ensure their safety. Therefore, some people think that the government should increase spending on defence but spend less on social benefits. To what extent do you agree?
A country is run by officials and it is their responsibility to safeguard its citizens by providing necessary services. It is believed by some people that to do the same, the government should allocate a large amount of money to military services rather than to society-related services. This essay will argue why spending on social services is equally important as defense.
5
band
Many people say that universities should only offer places to young students with the highest marks, while others say they should accept people of all ages, even if they did not do well at school. Discuss both views and give your own opinion.
Some people argue that colleges should only provide places to excellent students, while another school of thought holds that they should allow all ages students, even they are fair students. In this essay, I am going to elucidate both viewpoints, before explaining why I lean towards the latter. It is understandable why some people subscribe to the view that people of all ages should be accepted, even if they are not good at school.
5
band
Buying things on the internet such as book, air ticket and groceries is becoming more and more popular. Do the advantages of shopping in this way outweigh the disadvantages.
These days, many people prefer to live in rented accommodations rather than own their own homes. While renting offers benefits such as flexibility and no maintenance responsibilities, it also has significant drawbacks, including the inability to build equity and the potential for increasing rental payments over time.

Nowadays, a growing number of people with health problems are trying alternative medicines and treatments instead of visiting their usual doctor. Do you think this is a positive or a negative development?

Word Count

Do you think the advantages of online shopping outweigh the disadvantages?

Some people believe that art, such as painting and music, does not improve people’s lives, so the government should not spend money on it. To what extent do you agree with this statement? Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge and experiences.

A government has a responsibility to its citizen to ensure their safety. Therefore, some people think that the government should increase spending on defence but spend less on social benefits. To what extent do you agree?

Many people say that universities should only offer places to young students with the highest marks, while others say they should accept people of all ages, even if they did not do well at school. Discuss both views and give your own opinion.

Buying things on the internet such as book, air ticket and groceries is becoming more and more popular. Do the advantages of shopping in this way outweigh the disadvantages.