Learning English at school is often seen as more important than learning local languages. If these are not taught, many are at risk of dying out. In your opinion, is it important for everyone to learn English? Should we try to ensure the survival of local languages and, if so, how?

Nowadays,
English
has become the most used
language
in the world. It serves as the primary
language
for international communication, science, business, and technology.
However
, the
English
language
can risk fading the local
language
.
Therefore
, in my opinion,
although
learning
English
is useful, still the local
language
has to be preserved in the future. On one side, the
English
language
is used everywhere in the world. The advantage when we can speak
English
. It allows people to communicate globally, access a lot of knowledge, and build an opportunity to reach higher careers. Making it a gateway to professional and higher education. For individuals, the advantage of being able to speak
English
can improve their academic growth and their communication with other people from other countries.
On the other hand
, local languages are essential to cultural identity and heritage. Each local
language
has its own expression and its people's historical values. When a local
language
dies, it is an irreplaceable piece of cultural knowledge and tradition that will be lost.
This
language
holds generations of wisdom, folklore, and custom.
That is
why we have to protect and maintain our mother tongue. In conclusion,
English
is important for students to learn in their future education and career, yet the local
language
still has to be preserved in order to be inherited by the next generation.
Submitted by riani.the2 on

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specific examples
To enhance your essay, consider elaborating on your points with more specific examples. For instance, you could mention specific regions or communities where local languages are at risk and how they are being preserved.
coherence cohesion
Try to maintain consistency in your argument. In several parts, the essay discusses both the importance of English and local languages, but integrating these points more clearly would improve clarity.
introduction conclusion
The essay presents a solid introduction and a clear conclusion that summarizes key points effectively.
supported main points
Overall, the arguments presented for both the importance of English and the need to preserve local languages are well-founded and relevant.
logical structure
The essay maintains a logical structure with well-segmented paragraphs that each focus on a single main idea.

Fully explain your ideas

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For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

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Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • global communication
  • economic opportunities
  • cultural diversity
  • endangered
  • linguistic heritage
  • inclusive
  • multilingualism
  • language revitalization
  • language policy
  • language preservation
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