Many manufactured food and drink products contain high levels of sugar, which causes many health problems. Sugary products should be made more expensive to encourage people to consume less sugar. Do you agree or disagree?

Many processed food and drink
products
contain high levels of
sugar
, leading to various
health
issues
such
as obesity, diabetes, and heart disease. Some argue that increasing the price of sugary
products
could reduce their consumption.
However
, I disagree that higher
prices
alone would effectively address
this
problem, as it may lead to unintended consequences without guaranteeing improved public
health
.
Firstly
, raising the cost of sugary foods does not tackle the root causes of high
sugar
consumption. People often choose these
products
due to
a lack of awareness about healthier options or because
sugar
is commonly added to a wide range of processed foods, from snacks to sauces. Without proper education and clear
labeling
Change the spelling
labelling
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, consumers might not alter their habits simply because of higher
prices
. Public
health
campaigns and school programs promoting healthy eating would be more effective in driving long-term change.
Moreover
, increasing
prices
would disproportionately affect low-income individuals who may already rely on affordable,
sugar
-laden foods. These
products
are often some of the cheapest options, and raising their costs could deepen financial strain without providing affordable, healthier alternatives.
As a result
,
this
approach risks widening
health
inequalities. In conclusion,
while
higher
prices
might reduce
sugar
consumption to some extent, a more comprehensive strategy involving education and affordable healthy options is needed to truly address the
health
issues caused by excessive
sugar
intake.
This
would promote informed choices without unfairly burdening lower-income individuals.
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task achievement
Consider providing more specific examples or evidence to support your points. This will strengthen your argument and provide clear, concrete reasons for your position.
task achievement
Further elaborate on the education campaigns or policies you mentioned. Adding specific examples or details could make your argument more convincing and relatable.
coherence cohesion
The essay is well-organized with a clear introduction and conclusion. It follows a logical structure that makes it easy to understand the writer's viewpoint.
coherence cohesion
Main points in the essay are well-supported and clearly convey the rationale behind the disagreement with increasing sugar product prices.

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    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • health problems
  • manufactured food and drink products
  • sugary products
  • excessive sugar consumption
  • discourage
  • promote
  • healthier choices
  • reduce
  • increased taxes
  • fund
  • health education
  • prevention programs
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