In many countries, people are now living longer than ever before. Some people say an aging population creates problems for governments. Other people think there are benefits if society has more elderly people. To what extent do the advantages of having an aging population outweigh the disadvantages?

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Many individuals consider that having an

aging

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ageing

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population

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is a challenging issue for governments

due to

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wasted national budgets and the expectation for younger families to provide

care

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for them.

However

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, the existence of older

people

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brings benefits

such

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as inspiring younger

people

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, and a large

aging

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ageing

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population

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proves the success of a country's prosperity.

This

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essay will explore the benefits of a large number of unproductive ages in society but

also

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explain the drawbacks of their existence, with examples and a rational conclusion. First of all, older

people

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can be an inspiration to younger

people

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who lack

life

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experience. In contemporary society, the rise of the quarter-

life

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crisis trend is caused by pressures of professional lives and

also

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of their families. Seeking advice from older

people

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about the dynamics of

life

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can give valuable solutions to younger

people

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's problems.

For instance

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, complications in work and family

life

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such

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as marital disputes and the complexities of raising children, often arise; consulting the older generation is one of the best ways to address them.

Moreover

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, having a long

life

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expectancy shows that the

government

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has provided prosperity for its

population

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due to

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health and happiness. The drawbacks associated with having a large

aging

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ageing

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population

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are the increasing financial burdens on the

government

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. The invisible truth is that older

people

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are not productive workers, so the

government

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has to facilitate their health even though they are not part of the workforce.

For instance

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, as

people

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get older, their physical performance begins to decrease, so the

government

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has to provide subsidies or free medicine and treatment.

Furthermore

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, another problem is that their children have a responsibility to

care

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for them, so they have to balance their time between their work and family responsibilities. In conclusion, there are advantages to society: older

people

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can inspire younger

people

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in complicated

life

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situations and

also

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serve as an indicator of societal prosperity.

However

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, there are disadvantages, including the burden on national finances to

care

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for them and the problems faced by their children in providing

such

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care

Use synonyms

ru.kabiru.biruSat Nov 02 2024

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Improvement

Your essay effectively discusses both the advantages and disadvantages of an aging population. However, you can enhance your analysis by providing more detailed examples and statistical data that demonstrate the scope of these impacts. Including specific countries or scenarios would further strengthen your argument.

Improvement

Although your essay has a strong introduction and conclusion, ensure that your ideas are fully developed in each paragraph. Try to elaborate on each point a bit more and connect them more explicitly to the essay prompt.

Structure

Your essay has a well-structured and clear introduction and conclusion that encapsulate the main points discussed. This provides a good framework for the reader and enhances the readability of your work.

Content

Your main ideas are supported well with relevant examples, such as the impact of life experience from older people and the financial burden on governments, which make your essay thoughtful and engaging.

Language

The use of complex sentence structures and sophisticated vocabulary demonstrates a high level of language proficiency and enhances the overall quality of your essay.

Your opinion

Don’t put your opinion unless you are asked to give it.

If the question asks what you think, you MUST give your opinion to get a good score.

Don’t leave your opinion until the conclusion.

Here are examples of instructions that require you to give your opinion:

...do you agree or disagree?...do you think...?...your opinion...?

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8
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
5
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
3
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 4.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 6.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 6.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 8.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

341 words

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Topic Vocabulary:

ageing population
benefits
disadvantages
advantages
experience
knowledge
contribution
economy
society
healthcare
youth employment
community
intergenerational support
volunteerism
mentorship
increased demand
pension costs
social welfare systems
workforce
productivity
intergenerational conflict
technological adaptability
dependency
effective
skill development
employment opportunities
intergenerational solidarity
communication
lifelong learning
technological literacy
age-friendly
social policies
infrastructure

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