We live in a world of technology these days. While the internet brings with it clear advantages, the problems in terms of control and security of information outweighs the advantages. To what extent do you agree

#world #technology #internet #terms #control #security #information

✨ Do you want to improve your IELTS writing?

The recent decade has changed our daily routines turbulently

due to

internet development and its prominence.

While

there are an immense number of advantages like permanent connection with family or friends, doing a job digitally and searching for any information still, some people believe that because of a lack of security, its benefits have outweighed with disadvantages. I strongly disagree with them for two reasons: cybersecurity now is at the highest level and you can secure your information safely and there are some protected apps where you can keep your details confidently.

Firstly

, in our contemporary world, it has become essential to keep up with new technological updates like IOS 18 that programmers suggest,

consequently

, you would not be at risk of information hacking.

Additionally

, if you have a business which requires more powerful protection you can hire IT secure professionals who will ensure your business’s privacy and guarding.

Moreover

, software developers created software like Instagram which is safer to use than Messenger for sending pictures

due to

numerous choices of sending pictures type. If you truly care about your privacy it is crucial to raise your awareness about some specific system, its aim and security. If I had some personal picture to send I would definitely choose Instagram.

To sum up

, I assume that the advantages mentioned above like connection, digital jobs and studies have outweighed online crimes that become frequent.

However

this

situation can be controlled by IT professionals and more protected computer programs which software developers can suggest.

Submitted by sesili.kasrashvili7 on Sun Nov 03 2024

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Language

Consider using a wider range of sentence structures to enhance the variety of the essay.

Content

Incorporate more specific examples to provide stronger evidence for your points.

Structure

Enhance the logical progression of ideas by ensuring each paragraph transitions smoothly into the next.

Structure

The essay has a clear introduction and conclusion that align well with each other.

Content

The essay addresses different aspects of the topic and presents arguments both for and against.

Language

The use of technology-related terminology adds relevance and context to your discussion.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

Paragraph 1 - Introduction

Sentence 1 - Background statement
Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
Sentence 3 - Thesis
Sentence 4 - Outline sentence

Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 4 - Conclusion

Sentence 1 - Summary
Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

9
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
0
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
0
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 9.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 9.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 7.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

251 words

🚀 Prepare for IELTS writing section today!

Unlimited Task 1 & Task 2 checks
Practice with essays, charts, and letters.
Personalized suggestions & mistake analysis
Spot every mistake and boost your score.
Topic ideas & vocabulary helpers
Expand your ideas and use the right words.
Progress tracking
Watch your writing improve with every practice.

Topic Vocabulary:

global connectivity
digital banking
cybersecurity
data protection
security breaches
cyber attacks
online transactions
digital divide
surveillance
freedom of information
responsible usage
ethical considerations
digital footprints
online behavior
information inequality

What to do next:

Look at other essays:

5.5
band
Teachers think that international student exchange would be beneficial for all teenage students . Do you think its advantages outweigh its disadvantages?
It is true that every teenagers will gain benefits when doing a global student exchange. This essay will discuss the disadvantage of being an exchanged student in other countriees, which is eclipsed by the advantage of this view involved.
8.5
band
Completing university education is thought by some to be the best way to get a good job. On the other hand, other people think that getting experience and developing soft skills is more skills is more important. Discuss both sides and give your opinion.
There are different attitudes towards the best approach to gaining a better job position among other applicants. While some people believe that obtaining a qualification from a university is the most significant factor in this regard, others argue that developing soft skills and having relevant experience play a vital role in receiving a better offer. In my opinion, all these matters differ from one job position to another.
8
band
Some people say that to prevent illness and disease, governments should focus more on reducing environmental pollution and housing problems. To what extend do you agree or disagree?
Several individuals believe that in order to hinder sickness and patience in society, authorities should control environment-related contaminations and household issues. I definitely agree with this belief and in this essay, I will explain my idea.
6
band
An increasing number of developing countries are expanding tourist industries. Do you think the advantages outweigh the disadvantages?
In recent years, individuals have experienced longer commute times to their offices or schools than ever before. This trend can be attributed to various factors, including recent economic challenges. It is essential for the government to play a significant role in addressing these issues to improve the quality of life for its citizens.
6
band
Write a letter to your friend about a job opportunity you came across that they might find interesting. In your letter, you should: •give some details about the job •mention how you came across the job opportunity •explain why you feel the job would be suitable for your friend
Hope this letter finds you in radiant health and best of spirits. It’s been a long time since we met. I’m writing this letter to let you about a job vacancy which I saw in “The New York Times” newspaper yesterday.

We live in a world of technology these days. While the internet brings with it clear advantages, the problems in terms of control and security of information outweighs the advantages. To what extent do you agree

Fully explain your ideas

Teachers think that international student exchange would be beneficial for all teenage students . Do you think its advantages outweigh its disadvantages?

Completing university education is thought by some to be the best way to get a good job. On the other hand, other people think that getting experience and developing soft skills is more skills is more important. Discuss both sides and give your opinion.

Some people say that to prevent illness and disease, governments should focus more on reducing environmental pollution and housing problems. To what extend do you agree or disagree?

An increasing number of developing countries are expanding tourist industries. Do you think the advantages outweigh the disadvantages?

Write a letter to your friend about a job opportunity you came across that they might find interesting. In your letter, you should: •give some details about the job •mention how you came across the job opportunity •explain why you feel the job would be suitable for your friend