We live in a world of technology these days. While the internet brings with it clear advantages, the problems in terms of control and security of information outweighs the advantages. To what extent do you agree

#world #technology #internet #terms #control #security #information

The recent decade has changed our daily routines turbulently

due to

internet development and its prominence.

While

there are an immense number of advantages like permanent connection with family or friends, doing a job digitally and searching for any information still, some people believe that because of a lack of security, its benefits have outweighed with disadvantages. I strongly disagree with them for two reasons: cybersecurity now is at the highest level and you can secure your information safely and there are some protected apps where you can keep your details confidently.

Firstly

, in our contemporary world, it has become essential to keep up with new technological updates like IOS 18 that programmers suggest,

consequently

, you would not be at risk of information hacking.

Additionally

, if you have a business which requires more powerful protection you can hire IT secure professionals who will ensure your business’s privacy and guarding.

Moreover

, software developers created software like Instagram which is safer to use than Messenger for sending pictures

due to

numerous choices of sending pictures type. If you truly care about your privacy it is crucial to raise your awareness about some specific system, its aim and security. If I had some personal picture to send I would definitely choose Instagram.

To sum up

, I assume that the advantages mentioned above like connection, digital jobs and studies have outweighed online crimes that become frequent.

However

this

situation can be controlled by IT professionals and more protected computer programs which software developers can suggest.

Submitted by sesili.kasrashvili7 on Sun Nov 03 2024

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Language

Consider using a wider range of sentence structures to enhance the variety of the essay.

Content

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Structure

Enhance the logical progression of ideas by ensuring each paragraph transitions smoothly into the next.

Structure

The essay has a clear introduction and conclusion that align well with each other.

Content

The essay addresses different aspects of the topic and presents arguments both for and against.

Language

The use of technology-related terminology adds relevance and context to your discussion.

Fully explain your ideas

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Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
Sentence 3 - Thesis
Sentence 4 - Outline sentence

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Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
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9Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
0Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
0Grammar mistakes
 

4 paragraphs

251 words

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 9.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 9.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 7.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

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Topic Vocabulary:

global connectivity
digital banking
cybersecurity
data protection
security breaches
cyber attacks
online transactions
digital divide
surveillance
freedom of information
responsible usage
ethical considerations
digital footprints
online behavior
information inequality

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We live in a world of technology these days. While the internet brings with it clear advantages, the problems in terms of control and security of information outweighs the advantages. To what extent do you agree

Fully explain your ideas

Art is considered an important part of a society as well as an expression of its culture. Do you think it is important for children to be taught art? Do you think children should be encouraged to focus on art rather than other subjects

9. Some people prefer to be self-employed, whereas others like working for companies or institutions. Discuss the advantages and disadvantages Which is a better approach.

The below gives information about rail transport in four counties in 2007.

In some societies, the number of crimes committed by teenagers is growing. Some people think that regardless of age, teenagers who commit major crimes should receive adult punishments. To what extent do you agree

ART CLASSES, SUCH AS PAINTING AND DRAWING, AE AS IMPORTANT TO A CHILD'S DEVELOPMENT AS OTHER SUBJECTS, SO IT SHOULD BE COMPULSORY IN HIGH SCHOOLS. TO WHAT EXTENT DO YOU AGREE OR DISAGREE ?