Some people believe that it is essential to include Physical Education classes in the curriculum children, others think that for all school age children's time is better spent on more academic subjects. Discuss both views and give your own opinion,

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Academic subjects
is
Correct subject-verb agreement
are
show examples
an important part
for
Change preposition
of
show examples
student
Fix the agreement mistake
students
show examples
learn knowledge and logical thinking, but physical
education
also
pay
Verb problem
plays
show examples
an essential role
for
Change preposition
in
show examples
teenerger
Correct your spelling
teenager
teenagers
build
Wrong verb form
building
show examples
up a healthy
lifetly
Correct your spelling
life
for
future
Correct article usage
the future
show examples
. In my opinion, I disagree with the
assert
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assertion
show examples
.
Admittetly
Correct your spelling
Admittedly
,
school age
Add a hyphen
school-age
show examples
children should
spent
Change the verb form
spend
show examples
more
time
on
academic
Add an article
an academic
show examples
subject
Fix the agreement mistake
subjects
show examples
, since it may affect the chance
to get
Change preposition
of getting
show examples
into
Correct article usage
a sennior
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sennior
Correct your spelling
senior
degree, which may
critical
Add a missing verb
be critical
show examples
for the
carear
Correct your spelling
career
pathway.
Students
should
pay
Verb problem
put
show examples
more effort
for
Change preposition
into
show examples
the
acedemic
Correct your spelling
academic
subject
,
for example
,
prolong
Wrong verb form
by prolonging
show examples
the study
time
of
Change preposition
for
show examples
certain
subject
Fix the agreement mistake
subjects
show examples
,
thus
they can get higher
score
Fix the agreement mistake
scores
show examples
in their academic performance and increase the competition value.
Hence
, many universities select their
students
only
depend
Wrong verb form
depending
show examples
on academic results. So it is reasonable that
students
spent
Wrong verb form
spend
show examples
most of
time
Correct pronoun usage
their time
show examples
for
Change preposition
apply
show examples
learning
main
Change the article
the main
show examples
subject
at school.
Furtheremore
Correct your spelling
Furthermore
, physical development for
students
should not
be ignore
Change the verb form
be ignored
show examples
, since
student
Fix the agreement mistake
students
show examples
should have multiple
development
Change to a plural noun
developments
show examples
at school. Physical
education
give
Change the verb form
gives
show examples
chances for
students
to try different kinds of
sport
Fix the agreement mistake
sports
show examples
and acquire more healthy knowledge. On
one
Correct article usage
the one
show examples
hand, physical
education
boost
Change the verb form
boosts
show examples
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
poteintial
Correct your spelling
potential
students
to
further
stimulate
thier
Correct your spelling
their
sport
Fix the agreement mistake
sports
show examples
skills and it is creating
sport
Fix the agreement mistake
sports
show examples
starts at the same
time
.
On the other hand
, physical
education
are
Change the verb form
is
show examples
giving
Wrong verb form
given
show examples
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
public health
education
, which
provide
Change the verb form
provides
show examples
healthy information for
students
and
leading
Wrong verb form
leads
show examples
them to build up regular
exercice
Correct your spelling
exercise
and
positive
Correct article usage
a positive
show examples
life-style
Correct your spelling
lifestyle
show examples
. It
also
Add a missing verb
is also
show examples
a foundation for
reduce
Change the form of the verb
reducing
show examples
the workload of hospitals and
prolong
Wrong verb form
prolonging
show examples
the life spent
of
Change preposition
by
show examples
citizens from a long-term perception. In
conlusion
Correct your spelling
conclusion
,
although
students
should
spent
Change the verb form
spend
show examples
more
time
on academic studies, it still can not
intead
Correct your spelling
instead
of
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
physical
education
.
Submitted by huangjiali617 on

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language use
Work on using clear and accurate vocabulary to express your ideas. This will improve both your task response and coherence.
task response
Provide more specific examples to support your arguments, particularly when discussing the benefits of physical education.
essay structure
The essay has a clear introduction and conclusion, helping to frame the discussion effectively.
balanced argument
The argument is balanced by discussing both views with relevant points.

Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

Examples make your writing easier to understand by illustrating points more effectively.

Examples, if used properly, not only help you get higher marks for ‘Task Response’ but also for ‘Coherence’.

When giving examples it is best to put them after your main idea or topic sentence. They can be used in the middle of supporting sentences or they can be used to start a new sentence. There is no rule for where exactly to give examples in essays, logically they would come after your main idea/topic sentence or just after a supporting sentence.

Linking words for giving examples:

  • for example
  • for instance
  • to illustrate this
  • to give a clear example
  • such as
  • namely
  • to illustrate
  • take, for example

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