IELTS Writing Correction Service /
Writing Samples /
Band 3

The plans below show a harbour in 2000 and how it looks today. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

#plans #show #harbour #summarise #information #features #comparisons
The map gives information about a
harbour
during
Change preposition
in
show examples
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
2000 and how it looks today after many changes.
Overall
, the
harbour
 had a lot of modifications which
result
Wrong verb form
resulted
show examples
 in more facilities for people and more space for cars and
boats
. In
the
Change the article
apply
show examples
2000, at the west of the
harbour
Add a comma
harbour,
show examples
 there
was
Correct subject-verb agreement
were
show examples
 showers and toilets, and a car park connected
with
Change preposition
to
show examples
 the main road. At the
east
Add a comma
east,
show examples
 it was Marina private yachts, which is the entrance of the dock. At the
northeast
Add a comma
northeast,
show examples
 there was a dock with space for 2
boats
 and
an
Remove the article
apply
show examples
access to the public
beach
. At the southwest there was a car park, at the east there
was
Change the verb form
were
show examples
 fishing
boats
. At the
south
Add a comma
south,
show examples
 there was a castle and a public
beach
. nowadays, after many
changes
Add a comma
changes,
show examples
 the
harbour
 looks very different.
At
Change preposition
In
show examples
 the
west
Add a comma
west,
show examples
 the showers and toilets and the car park are still there.
At
Change preposition
In
show examples
 the
west
Add a comma
west,
show examples
 we have now fishing
boats
and
Correct word choice
apply
show examples
more space for the
boats
 and
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
access to the public
beach
.
At
Change preposition
In
show examples
 the
southwest
Add a comma
southwest,
show examples
 we have more showers and toilets, and the carpark was modified to connect to
main
Change the article
the main
show examples
 road. At the east there are now cafes and shops, the castle went into a hotel and the
beach
 is now private.
Submitted by daniruspi on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Coherence & Cohesion
Ensure there is a clear and concise introduction and conclusion to frame your description. Currently, the essay lacks a distinct conclusion that summarizes the main points or insights gained from the comparison.
Coherence & Cohesion
Improve the clarity by avoiding repetition and organizing information logically. For example, organizing by discussing the changes in a systematic order (e.g., start with one section of the harbor and move systematically to another) can help.
Task Response
Be more precise in your descriptions. Phrases like 'more space for boats' could include specific details, such as the number of additional berths added.
Task Response
Include more specific examples of changes, such as the new facilities added or removed, to fully illustrate how the harbor has transformed.
Task Achievement
You successfully captured the main changes between 2000 and today, allowing the reader to understand the transformations that the harbor underwent.
Coherence & Cohesion
The piece generally follows a chronological order, which makes it easier for the reader to follow the progression of changes.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Topic Vocabulary:
  • harbour (or harbor)
  • docks
  • shipping lanes
  • warehouses
  • recreational areas
  • infrastructure
  • additions
  • removals
  • facilities
  • environmental sustainability
  • economic impact
  • local community
  • capacity
  • technological advancements
  • industrial shipping
  • recreational use
  • surrounding infrastructure
What to do next:
Look at other essays: