Some people think that children should begin their formal education at a very early age. Others believe that they should start school at least 7 years old. Discuss both views and give your own opinion. Write at least 250 words.
Some individuals advocate for initiating
children
’s formal education at a tender age
, while
others assert that school
should commence no earlier than the age
of seven. From my perspective
I firmly agree with the latter Add a comma
perspective,
points
of view. Fix the agreement mistake
point
This
essay will elaborate on these two mentioned judgments, along with
the rationale behind the answer.
Even though starting school
at a young age
can bring some advantages, this
phenomenon is often considered to be Correct article usage
a disadvantages
disadvantages
Fix the agreement mistake
disadvantage
due to
various reasons. In terms of cognitive, children
at an early stage don’t have a
comprehensive development Correct article usage
apply
about
Change preposition
apply
it
, which can make them have numerous difficulties in dealing with Correct pronoun usage
apply
the
alien environment. Correct article usage
an
Furthermore
, making children
step out of their comfort zone may pose a grave threat to their mental health. Because, at school
they may face Add a comma
school,
up to
a variety of pressures , ranging from academic results to peers, or being bullied,... that Change preposition
apply
children
should have not experienced at such
a young age
.
On the other hand
, making children
attend school
beyond the age
of seven will be more practical and ethical. Because, at this
age
, their cognitive ability has developed at a certain level which can help them have enough confidence and ability to face with
a strange and new surrounding without their parents’ Change preposition
apply
back up
. Correct your spelling
backup
Besides
, 7 years old is an appropriate time for children
to start a new journey, since they will be extremely active at this
stage, their infinite curiosity about the world will drive them to acquire new knowledge effectively without being overwhelmed.
In conclusion, there will be various potential risks if children
are sent to school
at a tender age
; therefore
, I concur with the notion that
allowing Change preposition
of
children
to access formal education when they are older than seven years. instead
of at a minor age
. Because, the older they get, the better they handle the school
.Submitted by elsenglish16992 on
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relevant specific examples
Try to provide specific examples or scenarios to strengthen your arguments. This will enhance the persuasiveness and depth of your essay.
clear comprehensive ideas
Ensure that all ideas presented in the essay are clearly linked to the central thesis statement. Although the main points are generally clear, reinforcing their connection will improve clarity.
introduction conclusion present
While your conclusion is well-written, summarizing the key points discussed in the body more explicitly could reinforce the essay's unity and keep the reader focused on your main arguments.
introduction conclusion present
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logical structure
The essay maintains a logical structure and flow with effective transitions between ideas and paragraphs, which aids in comprehension.
complete response
You have clearly addressed both sides of the argument and presented your stance, enabling a balanced discussion.
Fully explain your ideas
To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).
For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:
- Paragraph 1 - Introduction
- Sentence 1 - Background statement
- Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
- Sentence 3 - Thesis
- Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
- Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
- Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
- Sentence 2 - Example
- Sentence 3 - Discussion
- Sentence 4 - Conclusion
- Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
- Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
- Sentence 2 - Example
- Sentence 3 - Discussion
- Sentence 4 - Conclusion
- Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
- Sentence 1 - Summary
- Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
- Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation
Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.