Governments should spend money on railways rather than roads. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this statement?
Owning to an increasing number
individuals
assume that government funding should Change preposition
of individuals
expense
on Wrong verb form
be spent
railways
rather than roads. Although
I agree with this
statement, I believe that it would lead to certain challenges, such
as lower
the number of customers for taxi services.
On the one hand, the major advantage of Replace the word
lowering
spend
money on train systems is it will reduce air pollution. Private Change the verb form
spending
vehicle
have exhaust pipes that release smoke into the air and if there are a lot of them the toxins will accumulate in the atmosphere . Fix the agreement mistake
vehicles
This
contribute
to climate change Change the verb form
contributes
such
as global warming. Furthermore
, it can alleviate traffic congestion. By Increase
Replace the word
Increasing
railways
, pupils would turn to use
them more than Wrong verb form
using
automobile
. Fix the agreement mistake
automobiles
This
would result in faster transportation and also
reduce accident rates.
On the other hand
, the notable effect of investment more railways
could be a reduction in demand for taxi services. As more people choose to use trains for their daily transportation, taxi driver
may experience a decrease in customers, leading to lower income for those who rely on Fix the agreement mistake
drivers
this
business. Another impact is the inconvenience caused by neglected roads. If funding is primarily directed towards railways
, the maintenance and improvement of road infrastructure may suffer. For instance
, some individuals that
need to travel to rural Correct pronoun usage
who
area
may experience unsafe driving conditions.
Fix the agreement mistake
areas
To sum
up
everything that has been started so far, it is considered that it can alleviate climate Add a comma
up,
changes
and tackle Fix the agreement mistake
change
the
congestion, but there will be lower income in some jobs and some inconvenience. Correct article usage
apply
This
actively demonstrates that government
should Correct article usage
the government
expense
more money on Verb problem
spend
railways
but that does not mean they should not.Submitted by esaraica on
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coherence cohesion
Try to structure your paragraphs more clearly, each focusing on a single main idea. This will make your argument easier to follow.
coherence cohesion
Make sure each paragraph has a clear main idea supported by specific examples or evidence to strengthen your points.
task achievement
Address more specific examples to further illustrate your points.
task achievement
Ensure your argument is more comprehensive, covering different aspects of the topic.
coherence cohesion
The essay presents an introduction and a conclusion, providing a good overview and summary of the argument.
task achievement
There is a clear attempt to balance the argument by acknowledging potential disadvantages of spending more on railways.