Technology is becoming increasingly prevalent in the world today. In the not too distant future, technology will completly replace the teacher in the classroom . Do you agree or disagree with this statement?
Nowadays the most increasingly thing is
technology
especially
about education system. Add the comma(s)
, especially
Technology
will change the place with human teacher
in the foreseeable future. I do not think it will happen so Fix the agreement mistake
teachers
i
am not with that opinion.
Change the capitalization
I
Firstly
technology
never be like a human teacher
, because it has no idea about student
feelings and problems Fix the agreement mistake
students
because
if students have any problem Correct word choice
apply
about
anything they can not focus on their Change preposition
with
study
. Fix the agreement mistake
studies
Secondly
Add a comma
Secondly,
people
can not connect with any technology
and also
face-to-face interaction is another important thing between teacher
and student. Finally
Add a comma
Finally,
people
can help and understand each other but technology
never.
On the one hand
every Add a comma
hand,
people
Fix the agreement mistake
person
make
mistakes but Correct subject-verb agreement
makes
technology
is not a human so it is perfect and never make
Correct subject-verb agreement
makes
mistake
about anything. Fix the agreement mistake
mistakes
Technology
is created by people
, so it does not rank higher than the people
. On the other
hand
Add a comma
hand,
technology
has a wealth of comfortly
sides Correct your spelling
comfort
about
education Change preposition
to
for example
it can teach the lesson more clearly than human
Add an article
a human
teacher
.
To sum up
, it does not matter how much grow
Verb problem
apply
technology
, it cannot to takes
the place Verb problem
take
in
humans.Change preposition
of
Submitted by Writing9 on
Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.
Coherence and Cohesion
Work on organizing your ideas more logically. Ensure each paragraph has a clear central idea and that there is a logical progression from one paragraph to the next. Using linking words or phrases can help with the flow of the essay.
Task Achievement
Provide more detailed examples to support your points. This will strengthen your arguments and make your essay more convincing.
Task Achievement
Try to elaborate more on your ideas to make them clearer for the reader. This includes explaining why you think technology can or cannot replace teachers in certain ways.
Task Achievement
The essay addresses the prompt and takes a clear position on the issue, which is critical to achieving task response.
Task Achievement
You have rightly identified some important aspects, like the importance of human interaction and emotional understanding, which are relevant to the topic at hand.
Coherence and Cohesion
The essay contains an introduction and a conclusion, which help in framing the argument and summarizing your main points.
Fully explain your ideas
To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).
For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:
- Paragraph 1 - Introduction
- Sentence 1 - Background statement
- Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
- Sentence 3 - Thesis
- Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
- Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
- Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
- Sentence 2 - Example
- Sentence 3 - Discussion
- Sentence 4 - Conclusion
- Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
- Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
- Sentence 2 - Example
- Sentence 3 - Discussion
- Sentence 4 - Conclusion
- Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
- Sentence 1 - Summary
- Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
- Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation
Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.
Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+
Learn how to write high-scoring essays with powerful words.Download Free PDF and start improving you writing skills today!