People increasingly access the news online these days, rather than bying newspapers and magazines to find our what is going on. Some people predict that, because of the spread of Internet news, the newspapers will disappear at some point in the future. Do you agree that newspapers will die out in the future

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It is often said that the
Internet
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provide
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provides
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people
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with the latest
news
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more than newspapers and magazines.It could be a reason for
paper based
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paper-based
show examples
news
Use synonyms
would vanish. Humans expect that , because of the rapidly spreading information online. Personally, I completely agree with that statement, as I have witnessed these changes with my own eyes in
a
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apply
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real life. On the one hand , online
news
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connect
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connects
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us with all information that happens around the world extremely quickly. A majority of
population
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the population
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, especially young
people
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relies on social media to be aware of today’s world. The
Internet
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connection allows us to the most
recently
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recent
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news
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in seconds.
For instance
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, when a member of the renowned boy band
has
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apply
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died after falling from the third floor of a hotel a few weeks ago, fans knew about that accident before his family. One of the followers saw a
tragical
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tragic
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falling and posted that he was a witness
of
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to
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singer’s
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the singer’s
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death. The post went viral very fast.
Moreover
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,
people
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are able to be well informed of
news
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of countries where relatives live. It makes
feel
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them feel
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less worried about
safety
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the safety
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of their families. To illustrate, information about earthquakes in Turkey which happened one year ago were in various
news
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sites. These sites immediately linked everyone with
cities’
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the cities’
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condition
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conditions
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and
number
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the number
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of injured civilians.
On the other hand
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, there could be misinformation and fake
news
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in
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on
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the
Internet
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, rather than
newspapers
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in newspapers
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. These facts could cause panic and severe damage to the psychology of humans because of unreliable
source
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sources
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. Nowadays, adults and youth believe everything that they see online.
For example
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, which state is guilty
in
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of
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wars
.
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?
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Citizens could look through
to
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apply
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the not verified articles and consider them as a truth. It creates wrong opinions and could support violence and cruelty.
However
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,
news
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that is
Linking Words
confirmed by
government
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the government
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is more trustworthy. It
likely
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is likely
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geared towards being knowledgeable about these days. In conclusion,
i
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I
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strongly believe that paper
news
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could be vanished in future. Probably , because benefits prevail
drawbacks
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over drawbacks
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of using the
Internet
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as a source of
world’
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world
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s
Correct your spelling
's
adjustments.
Less
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Fewer
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people
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might go through magazines to check updates. It is easier and faster to use new technology.
Submitted by nana_skylife on

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Coherence and Cohesion
To improve coherence and cohesion, work on subsections within paragraphs for a clearer progression of ideas. The logical structure could be strengthened by ensuring each point links smoothly to the next. Use clear signposting language such as 'Firstly', 'Additionally', and 'In conclusion'.
Task Achievement
For better task achievement, ensure that each point made about the future demise of newspapers is thoroughly explored. Some ideas, like misinformation on the internet, could be further elaborated to enhance the breadth of the argument.
Coherence and Cohesion
The introduction and conclusion effectively set up and wrap up the piece, offering a clear stance on the topic.
Task Achievement
Good use of specific and relevant examples, like the social media incident, which helps illustrate the arguments effectively.
Task Achievement
The essay provides a comprehensive response to the task, discussing relevant issues such as the speed and accessibility of online news versus traditional newspapers.

Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately

Linking words are very important in your essay.

To score effectively on your IELTS exam, you should make an effort to implement short concise sentences coupled with linking words.

Almost every sentence in your essay should have a linking word of some sort.

In fact, the only sentences that can omit linking words are your background sentence and thesis.

Linking word examples:

  • firstly
  • secondly
  • thirdly
  • in additional
  • moreover
  • also
  • for example
  • for instance
  • therefore
  • however
  • although
  • even though
  • despite

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