Tourism is encouraged in many countries. Does tourism bring more advantages or disadvantages to a country?

Tourism
is booming in many countries. Some believe that it brings great benefits to society as it boosts the
economy
and creates job
opportunities
.
While some
Correct word choice
Some
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others argue that the tourist
industry
may potentially harm the environment as it generates much more carbon footprint than the earth
cannot
Rephrase
can
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handle in
Correct article usage
the long-term
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long-term
Correct your spelling
long term
show examples
.
While
I believe
tourism
brings both
opportunities
and challenges in contemporary society.
Tourism
brings many advantages in boosting the
economy
, preservation of cultural heritages and encouraging the development of the entertainment
industry
. In many countries,
tourism
is one of the most important industries that contributes the economic growth. It boosts the
economy
in retail, infrastructure,
hospitality
Correct word choice
and hospitality
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and creates job
opportunities
for many people.
For example
, in Thailand, New Zealand and
in
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apply
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Singapore,
tourism
are
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is
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isthe
Correct your spelling
is the
the
main engine for GDP growth, which contributes substantial tax revenue for the government, which in turn is used for local development and investment.
In addition
, the encouragement of
tourist
Correct article usage
the tourist
show examples
industry
may help local people to better preserve
the
Change the word
their
show examples
cultural heritages. Income from tourists can be used for the maintenance of ancient buildings, arts and museums.
As a result
, local people could take
this
opportunity to preserve
antient
Correct your spelling
ancient
buildings and paintings, so as to understand their own culture deeply and comprehensively. On the flip side, the opponents argue that travel causes environmental damage. Public transportation
such
as airlines, trains and buses are the main sources of carbon footprint, which may cause environmental degradation and harm the natural habitats.
For example
, the Great Barrier Reef in Australia is overly reliant on
tourism
, with a large influx of visitors leading to damage to the local ecological environment., the biodiversity decreased, and a lot of marine creatures suffer.
Moreover
, over-relay on
tourism
leads to economic vulnerability. An economic downturn is likely to occur
with in
Correct your spelling
within
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countries that have simple structure
economy
Fix the agreement mistake
economies
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such
as those experienced during the COVID pandemic.
Overall
,
tourism
has advantages in stimulating economic growth and creating job
opportunities
,
it
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but it
show examples
also
poses challenges in degrading the environment and
causecauses
Correct your spelling
causes
uncertainty to the
economy
. Striking the balance between the tourist
industry
and the structure of the
economy
will lead to a brighter future for a healthy economic structure.
Submitted by fanyi0511 on

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task achievement
Refine the introduction to clearly state your stance on the advantages or disadvantages of tourism.
coherence cohesion
Use more varied linking devices to enhance the logical flow throughout the essay.
coherence cohesion
Make sure the conclusion clearly summarizes the main points and presents your final stance on the issue.
task achievement
The essay effectively discusses both advantages and disadvantages of tourism, showing a balanced approach.
task achievement
Relevant examples such as those from Thailand, New Zealand, and Singapore are provided to support the points.
coherence cohesion
The main points are generally clear and well-organized, maintaining a logical flow.

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  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
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    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

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