Some people say that music is a good way of bringing people of different cultures and ages together. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this opinion?

#people #music #cultures #ages

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Nowadays, lots of

music

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festivals are run around the world. Some

people

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claim that it is a good idea to gather

people

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from different

cultures

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and nationalities together.

Although

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music

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is a way

for building

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to build

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up new connections, I think it doesn’t work in every situation. In

this

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essay, I will propose my opinion and in the

end

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end,

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I will draw some conclusions.

Firstly

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, International

concert’s

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concert

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thickets are not fully available for every nationality to be bought.

This

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means that some

people

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from certain countries couldn’t

join

Verb problem

attend

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these events.

Subsequently

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, they have no chance to visit new

cultures

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or communicate

new

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with new

show examples

people

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Secondly

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music

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has

got

Verb problem

apply

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several different categories.

For instance

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, only a small group of listeners enjoy hard metal

music

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and others describe it as annoying sounds. In

this

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situation, the metal fans don’t have the chance to meet new friends during the concert. By the way, the

music

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is so loud that they can’t even talk to each other.

On the other hand

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, many

people

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claim that

music

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is a national language.

Moreover

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, by joining a musical event in a new location, the contributors can sing and dance together and

also

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communicate

each

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with each

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other.

Consequently

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, they will be introduced to new

cultures

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passively. All things considered, it’s a general opinion that

music

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can bring

people

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together.

However

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, if we look precisely there are some obstacles like visa problems and different

music

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tastes. In my opinion,

people

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can meet new

tradition

Fix the agreement mistake

traditions

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and

cultures

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traveling

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travelling

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and

music

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couldn’t be a good reason in

this

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case.

Submitted by bahram.azizzade on Wed Nov 06 2024

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task achievement

Work on providing more relevant examples that directly connect to your main points. This will make your arguments stronger and more convincing.

coherence cohesion

Ensure your main points are thoroughly supported with explanations or examples to enhance the strength of your essay.

task achievement

The essay provides a balanced view by presenting both sides of the argument before concluding with the author's opinion.

coherence cohesion

The structure of the essay, with a clear introduction, body paragraphs, and a conclusion, is systematically organized and easy to follow.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

Paragraph 1 - Introduction

Sentence 1 - Background statement
Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
Sentence 3 - Thesis
Sentence 4 - Outline sentence

Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 4 - Conclusion

Sentence 1 - Summary
Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

11
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
3
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
9
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 6.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

5 paragraphs

256 words

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Topic Vocabulary:

universal language
evoke
connect
diverse audiences
cultural exchange
generational gaps
shared experiences
unifying force

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Some people say that music is a good way of bringing people of different cultures and ages together. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this opinion?

Fully explain your ideas

Nowadays both men and women spend a lot of money on beauty care. This was not so in the past. What may be the root cause of this behaviour? Discuss the reasons and possible results

You have recently started attending hobby classes in your city. Your mother in your hometown wants to know about it. Write a letter to your mother. In the letter, mention: •What class are you taking? •How do you like it? •How long will you take the classes?

Some university students want to learn about other subjects in addition to their main subjects. Others believe it is more important to give all their time and attention to studying for a qualification. Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.

Many people around the world use social media every day to keep in touch with other people get news events. Do you think the advantages outweigh the disadvantages?

Aar lot of old people e suffering from loneliness these days. They also lack physical fitness. What do you think are the reasons for this problem? Can you think of possible solutions?