In their advertising, businesses nowadays usually emphasise that their products are new in some way. Why is this? Do you think it is a positive or negative development?

Nowadays, many
companies
try to influence their consumers by advertising. I completely agree with the statement
due to
company finances and how they lose their customers. I will express my points in
this
essay.  
To begin
with, many
companies
spread ads among
people
.
In other words
, they care about funds,
whereas
they don’t care about
safisticating
Correct your spelling
sophisticating
the purchaser.
Moreover
, they avoid any problem or negative thing in the product,
while
there have been many bad effects that lead to disappointment between persons.
In
Change preposition
For
show examples
instance, the Vatic brand of shampoo and soap says, “If you use our product, you will find your hair taller than before.” Unfortunately, nothing happens to
people
who use the shampoo.  
However
, most
people
are sharing their personal
experiment
Replace the word
experience
show examples
of watching ads on many social media sites
such
as YouTube, Snap Chat, etc.;
therefore
, the company will lose many buyers because of the noise of the purchase.
Then
,
people
know the negative reputation of any trade by influencers at Instagram Chanel.
For example
, in 2012, a girl from Jamaica had the wrong size of iPad.
In
Change preposition
On
show examples
Instagram, I was told about the mistake. Apple does their best to calm her, but she refuses any excuse. Many
people
are influenced by
this
and stop buying until they write proper and honest information about the iPad.  
To sum up
,
people
have awareness nowadays, so
companies
can’t lie or they will lose customers.
Companies
should have more role from government to write the correct thing as they have it in real life. As can be expected, the products
were remained
Change to the active voice
remained
have remained
show examples
during the lie idea.
Submitted by mlo0oka98 on

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task achievement
Try to support your arguments with more specific and relevant examples to enhance the understanding and persuasiveness of your points.
task achievement
Focus on ensuring that the clarity of your ideas doesn't get lost, especially when discussing multiple points in a single paragraph.
coherence cohesion
Improve the logical flow by connecting ideas more explicitly in order to build a stronger argument.
coherence cohesion
It starts with a clear introduction and ends with a relevant conclusion, contributing to cohesive essay flow.
task achievement
The essay successfully highlights the importance of honesty in advertising and shows understanding of consumer behavior.

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • emphasise
  • advertising
  • products
  • innovation
  • competitive strategy
  • consumer dissatisfaction
  • value
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