IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 5

some people are interested in international news, others prefer watching national news. Discuss both views and give your opinion.

#people #news
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While
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 some
people
Use synonyms
 argue that as we are living in a global village, so worldwide information should be reached to them through local media, many others believe that they have nothing to do with the
news
Use synonyms
 related to other nations, local
news
Use synonyms
 of their region is enough.
This
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 essay intends to discuss both perspectives. I believe that both
approches
Correct your spelling
approaches
 are good in their own way. There are many reasons why some
people
Use synonyms
 believe that they need to know what is happening around them whether it is countrywise or citywise. They want to be made aware of the issues in neighbour
conitents
Correct your spelling
contents
 too
,
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apply
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 so that if there is
a
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apply
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any
possiblities
Correct your spelling
possibilities
 of crises they can be prepared ahead of time.
For example
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,
Correct article usage
the corona
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corona virus
Correct your spelling
coronavirus
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 was
initially
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 founded in
china
Capitalize word
China
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, but with the help of overseas
news
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 media,
people
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 of
neighbour
Replace the word
neighbouring
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 countries
got
Verb problem
became
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 aware in time and
was
Correct subject-verb agreement
were
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 ready to fight
with
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apply
show examples
this
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 disease. So, in view of
this
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 phenomenon, I think access to abroad
news
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 has myriad benefits, which can not be overlooked. on
other
Correct article usage
the other
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 hand, those who assert that watching national
news
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 is satisfying their curiosity, give their reasons as follows. First of all, some
individulas
Correct your spelling
individuals
 have never been to the
neighbour
Replace the word
neighbouring
show examples
 cities in their whole life span, for those
people
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i
Change the capitalization
I
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 think having access to the
news
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 of other parts of the world does not matter at all and it is
way
Add an article
a way
the way
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 of wasting
of
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apply
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time and resources.
Secondly
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, because
of
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apply
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lack of
loyality
Correct your spelling
loyalty
of
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to
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 these
news
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 channels for their
people
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, makes them hesitate to believe them blindly, whether for local
news
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 or international
news
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.
For example
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, the famous
news
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 channel AAJ TAK works for
well known
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well-known
show examples
 political
party
Fix the agreement mistake
parties
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 and they always focus on the good side of that party and defame other parties even if they are doing better. So,
that is
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 why
people
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 have trust issues with the media and they do not have any interest in worldwide
news
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 as long as they are providing
one sided
Add a hyphen
one-sided
show examples
 information. In conclusion, I reiterate my opinion that if the
news
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 is reaching
to
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apply
show examples
the
viewrs
Correct your spelling
viewers
is
Verb problem
apply
show examples
correct
Change the word
correctly
show examples
 and is not manipulated,
then
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 being able to get
news
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 from the other parts of the world is not less than a blessing, but if they are not working honestly for the
people
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, i do not think so individuals will prefer to watch the global
news
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.
Submitted by sidhunarinder591 on

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Coherence & Cohesion
Ensure to maintain consistent use of capital letters, especially at the beginning of each sentence and for proper nouns.
Coherence & Cohesion
Develop topic sentences more clearly to enhance logical distribution of ideas across paragraphs.
Task Achievement
Improve grammatical accuracy to minimize small errors in your writing.
Task Achievement
Clarify some ideas further for the reader's better understanding. More clarity will aid in delivering comprehensive arguments.
Coherence & Cohesion
Clear introduction and conclusion that effectively structure the essay.
Task Achievement
Relevant examples used to support main points, such as the example of the coronavirus and its global impact.
Task Achievement
Addresses both views of the topic, providing a balanced discussion.

Word Count

IELTS says that you should write a minimum of 250 words in writing task 2. If you go under word count you will lose marks in task response.

A very long essay will not give you a higher band score.

Aim for between 260 to 290 words in writing task 2. This will ensure a concise essay and will be realistic in terms of time management. You have only 40 minutes to write the essay and you need around 10 minutes of planning time, so you will not be able to write a long essay in 30 minutes.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

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