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Band 5

Some people say that economic growth is the only way to end world poverty and hunger. Others say that economic growth is causing damage to the environment and should be stopped now. Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.

#people #growth #world #poverty #hunger #damage #environment
There are two different views on whether economic
growth
 is the only way to solve global poverty and food shortages, or whether it should be banned immediately because of the cause of the damage it causes to the environment. From my perspective, I will discuss both
of
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apply
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views and give my own opinion. First of all, the growing
economy
 can figure out the
problem
 of starving. Since the economic
growth
, the government may
received
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receive
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 lots of money and it will be given to the poor as financial help. With the help of
the
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finance,
the
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households may have
ability
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the ability
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 to consume the daily stuff and food in order to solve the
problem
 of hunger.
Secondly
, producers can reproduce the products by increasing the
economy
. It can bring the industries back to life and the companies can provide
the
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jobs for unemployed people. Since people can receive
the
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salaries which will deal with the
problem
 of poverty. We have to admit that the
growth
 of the
economy
 can cause the
problem
 of environmental damage. With the production of the industries which are used for promoting the
economy
, pouring the industrial
waste water
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wastewater
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 can be one of the most serious
problem
Change to a plural noun
problems
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 which affects the environment.
However
,
this
problem
 can be solved by using the means of law. Using
the
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strict
method
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methods
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 like fining the factories can see a dramatic decrease
on
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in
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 the damage
of
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to
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 the environment.
Moreover
, after the
growth
 of the
economy
,
the
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advanced techniques can be invented which can play an important part in the environmental friendly. So the economic
growth
 can’t be stopped.
To sum up
, I agree with the former one. I believe that
the
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economic
growth
 cannot be banned and it is the only way to deal with
the
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poverty and hunger.
Submitted by 1378468145 on

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task achievement
Make sure to present balanced arguments for both views. Currently, the essay leans more towards showing the benefits of economic growth without sufficiently discussing the environmental concerns.
task achievement
Try to include more specific examples to support your points. This will provide clearer and more compelling arguments.
coherence cohesion
Ensure each paragraph transitions smoothly to improve the flow of the essay. Use cohesive devices to link ideas more effectively.
task achievement
The essay attempts to present both views on economic growth and its effects, which is essential for task achievement.
introduction conclusion present
The conclusion clearly states your opinion, summarizing the main points discussed.
logical structure
The essay has a clear structure with distinct paragraphs discussing separate points.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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