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Writing Samples /
Band 6

People will buy a product if it has quality or fulfil their needs. There is no need for advertisement. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

#people #product #quality #fulfil #advertisement
Whereas
 it is true that
people
 will keep buying
products
 with good quality without advertising, I do still believe that companies should advertise their
products
 to make consumers
are
Unnecessary verb
apply
show examples
aware of
products'
Correct article usage
the products'
show examples
 existence. First of all, in
this
 competitive modern world, advertisements are necessary. There are too many
products
 and too much information. Consumers can easily get confused by them. It is possible that they just make an easy decision, buying the cheapest
product
 or the most popular one.
Therefore
, companies should have strong marketing strategies and let
people
 know what is good about their
products
.
Also
,
people
 have different standards when
chosing
Correct your spelling
choosing
 something.
For instance
, imagine we buy an energy drink. Some buyers might want drinks with a lot of caffeine and others might want drinks with healthy ingredients.
Additionally
, they wouldn't know whether it is a good
product
 or a bad
product
 until they actually buy and use it. To make them take an initial step, which is buying a
product
 for the first time, it is crucial to give them
good
Correct article usage
a good
show examples
 impression which explains well why a certain
product
 is better than others and what it can offer to
people
. It can probably lead to the reduction of costs in the future because they already
proved
Correct your spelling
proven
show examples
products'
Correct article usage
the products'
show examples
 quality and
people
 will continue to consume them. In conclusion,
although
 companies themselves know how well their
products
 are made, marketing is essential to promote their
products
 which can bring good results in
people
's perceptions or sales in the end.
Submitted by dob.jeong on

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task achievement
Consider providing more specific examples to further support your arguments. This can help strengthen your essay and make your points more relatable for the reader.
coherence cohesion
While your essay is well-organized, integrating additional transition words or phrases can enhance the flow between ideas.
task achievement
The essay provides a clear response to the question, arguing the necessity of advertising even for quality products.
coherence cohesion
There is a strong introduction and conclusion that frame the argument well, providing a clear perspective from the start and a summary at the end.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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