Topic- Children today spend more time watching television than they did in the past. Describe some of the advantages and disadvantages for Children. Give reasons for your answers and include any relevant example from your knowledge.Topic- Children today spend more time watching television than they did in the past. Describe some of the advantages and disadvantages for Children. Give reasons for your answers and include any relevant example from your knowledge.

It is undeniable that the increasing usage of
television
by teenagers is one of the most challenging issues of our time.
This
essay will examine the advantages and disadvantages of
television
and provide a logical conclusion. The two main advantages of watching
television
are learning from educational shows and strengthening family bonding.
Firstly
, Educational shows can help
children
to learn about letters, numbers, colours and social skills. Shows like Dora can help
children
develop their cognitive skills and sense of wonder.
Secondly
, watching TV together can help families create shared experiences.
This
way,
children
spend more time with their parents which helps to make a healthy bond.
However
,
television
also
has some major disadvantages like sleep problems and physical inactivity.
Children
who watch TV may have problems falling asleep, watching their favourite shows late at night can lead them to have problems waking up early for school.
Furthermore
, Watching
television
can reduce physical activity.
For instance
, it can lead to obesity.
To conclude
,
although
television
has certain disadvantages like insomnia and inactivity, it has an extremely positive impact on
children
's schooling and family relationships.
Submitted by ss6802125 on

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task achievement
To enhance task response, provide more detailed and varied examples to support your points. This will add depth to the essay and make your arguments more convincing.
coherence and cohesion
While your essay is well-structured, consider using more varied connectives to improve coherence and cohesion.
introduction
The introduction clearly states the topic and intention of the essay, setting a good foundation for the reader.
task achievement
You effectively discuss both advantages and disadvantages, providing a balanced view.
conclusion
The conclusion effectively summarizes the main points and reinforces the essay's arguments.

Fully explain your ideas

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    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
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    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
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    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
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