IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 2.5

People attend college or university for many different reasons (for example, new experiences, career preparation, increased knowledge). Why do you think people attend college or university? Use specific reasons and examples to support your answer.

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Introduction
Attending college or
university
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 has become a trend in
modern
Add an article
the modern
show examples
 world.Many young
people
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 like
attend
Fix the infinitive
to attend
show examples
 college or
university
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.Because it can bring a lot of
benifits
Correct your spelling
benefits
 for them.
Body paragraph 1
First of all, it can help
people
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 to get more
knowlege
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knowledge
. Many
people
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 want to learn more
knowlege
Correct your spelling
knowledge
 in
university
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. And many
high level
Add a hyphen
high-level
show examples
knowlege
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knowledge
 can not
be learn
Change the verb form
be learned
show examples
 by
themselve
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themselves
. So they want to learn that in
university
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.
Body paragraph 2
Second,
Linking Words
people
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 do not want to get a
job
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. Many
people
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 want to get a rest in
university
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. They think
get
Wrong verb form
getting
show examples
 a
job
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 is very
tired
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tiring
show examples
. So they want to have more time to enjoy their
university
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 life.
Body paragraph 3
Moreover
Linking Words
, they think attending college or
university
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 can help them to earn more money in
Correct article usage
the furture
show examples
furture
Correct your spelling
future
.
Graduated
Wrong verb form
Graduating
show examples
 from
university
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 can help
people
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 to get a
job
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 more easily. And they can get a better
job
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 in their
furture
Correct your spelling
future
 life. Because
thet
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they
 get many
skill
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skills
show examples
 and
ability
Fix the agreement mistake
abilities
show examples
 in
university
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.
Conclusion
Aslo
Correct your spelling
Also
, attending
in
Change preposition
apply
show examples
university
Use synonyms
 can help them to
broden
Correct your spelling
broaden
 their horizon.

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coherence cohesion
Improve logical structure by organising ideas with clearer transitions and paragraphs.
task achievement
Enhance task response by fully developing ideas with specific examples and explanations.
coherence cohesion
Make sure to have an introduction and conclusion that clearly outline the main points discussed in the essay.
task achievement
The essay mentions multiple reasons why people attend college or university, such as gaining knowledge, avoiding work, and securing better jobs.
coherence cohesion
The writer provides a basic structure by mentioning different benefits of attending college or university, which shows an attempt to organise ideas logically.
Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »- a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

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