In spite of the advances made in agriculture, many people around the world still go hungry. Why is this the case? What can be done about this problem?

✨ Do you want to improve your IELTS writing?

Although

Linking Words

there has been some significant agricultural advancement,

but

Remove the conjunction

apply

show examples

some

people

Use synonyms

around the world still starving

due to

Linking Words

higher population and demand

also

Linking Words

increase

Change preposition

show examples

food

Use synonyms

price

Fix the agreement mistake

prices

show examples

as well

Linking Words

Correct your spelling

show examples

lower

food

Use synonyms

supply to the poor

people

Use synonyms

, these are the biggest problems for poor

people

Use synonyms

to get their needed

food

Use synonyms

. The most vital reason for not getting good enough

food

Use synonyms

for indigent

people

Use synonyms

is the low

food

Use synonyms

production which brings the increase of

food

Use synonyms

price

Fix the agreement mistake

prices

show examples

in the industry. If there is

low

Correct article usage

a low

show examples

food

Use synonyms

supply to the industry it will lead them to charge more than usual. Even if we have the

bestest

Correct your spelling

best

modern

equipments

Change the wording

equipment

types of equipment

pieces of equipment

show examples

we can not

full fill

Correct your spelling

fulfil

show examples

the

Change the word

our

show examples

needs.

For example

Linking Words

, a shopkeeper wanted to buy a good amount of fresh

Use synonyms

tomato

Fix the agreement mistake

tomatoes

show examples

but he failed because there wasn't very much

Change preposition

apply

show examples

tomato

Use synonyms

left to buy

due to

Linking Words

lower

Correct article usage

the lower

show examples

food

Use synonyms

supply to the market

that

Correct pronoun usage

apply

show examples

caused

Wrong verb form

causing

show examples

price-up and the shopkeeper only brought about some kg of

tomato

Use synonyms

, so many poor

people

Use synonyms

came to his shop but few

people

Use synonyms

could afford to buy

those

Change the determiner

that tomato

those tomatoes

show examples

tomato

Use synonyms

. That's why those who

was

Change the verb form

were

show examples

about to have some

food

Use synonyms

to cook with

tomatos

Correct your spelling

tomatoes

they

Correct pronoun usage

apply

show examples

failed to bring it and failed to eat for the whole day.

However

Linking Words

, there

Change the verb form

are

show examples

some possible solutions for these problems that will not conflict

Change preposition

with

show examples

starving

Replace the word

starvation

show examples

For instance

Linking Words

, Nuria started planting vegetable seeds and

harvest

Wrong verb form

harvesting

show examples

those regularly and achieved her required

food

Use synonyms

every day.

Therefore

Linking Words

, if

people

Use synonyms

started to plant vegetables

Change preposition

show examples

their own that

will

Wrong verb form

would

show examples

bring them real

food

Use synonyms

to eat

some

Correct quantifier usage

apply

show examples

how they

can

Wrong verb form

could

show examples

also

Linking Words

provide them

food

Use synonyms

by fishing or making

a fisheries

Correct the article-noun agreement

fisheries

a fishery

show examples

Change preposition

show examples

their own, they

can

Wrong verb form

could

show examples

also

Linking Words

sell it to the market

as well as

Linking Words

consume

for

Correct pronoun usage

it for

show examples

themselves. In conclusion, I think there will be always

starving

Replace the word

starvation

show examples

issue

Fix the agreement mistake

issues

show examples

even if we achieve the greatest modern technology for

agriculture

Replace the word

agricultural

show examples

use. So, the government should encourage impoverished

people

Use synonyms

to cultivate some

food

Use synonyms

themsevles

Correct your spelling

themselves

and

government

Correct article usage

the government

show examples

should help them

through

Change preposition

show examples

providing money and

equipments

Change the wording

equipment

types of equipment

pieces of equipment

show examples

also

Linking Words

the instruction that might lead them to no longer stay without

food

Use synonyms

for so long.

AL NURE FOYZUR REZA SUPRIOSat Nov 09 2024

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site's author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Coherence & Cohesion

Work on developing a clear and logical structure throughout your essay. Each paragraph should have a focused main idea, and transitions between paragraphs should be smoother to maintain cohesion.

Task Achievement

Aim to provide more detailed and relevant examples to strengthen your arguments and fully address the task. This will enhance the depth and quality of your response.

Coherence & Cohesion

Ensure that your introduction clearly outlines the issues at hand, and that your conclusion effectively summarizes the key points discussed. This helps in structuring the response more effectively.

Task Achievement

Consider expanding on your ideas and arguments to avoid repetition. Once a point is made, move on to new insights or different perspectives.

Coherence & Cohesion

You present a clear introduction that introduces the topic and sets the stage for your discussion.

Coherence & Cohesion

The essay closes with a conclusion that encapsulates the overall argument and proposes solutions, which strengthens the structure of your response.

Task Achievement

You've attempted to provide examples, illustrating some of your points, which adds to the persuasiveness of your arguments.

Task Achievement

The essay addresses both the causes of hunger and the potential solutions, which demonstrates an understanding of the task requirements.

Your opinion

Don’t put your opinion unless you are asked to give it.

If the question asks what you think, you MUST give your opinion to get a good score.

Don’t leave your opinion until the conclusion.

Here are examples of instructions that require you to give your opinion:

...do you agree or disagree?...do you think...?...your opinion...?

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

8
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
3
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
38
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 5.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 5.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

344 words

🚀 Prepare for IELTS writing section today!

Unlimited Task 1 & Task 2 checks
Practice with essays, charts, and letters.
Personalized suggestions & mistake analysis
Spot every mistake and boost your score.
Topic ideas & vocabulary helpers
Expand your ideas and use the right words.
Progress tracking
Watch your writing improve with every practice.

Topic Vocabulary:

inequality
distribution
access to resources
climate change
natural disasters
political factors
economic factors
agricultural practices
infrastructure
transportation
population growth
education
knowledge
food waste

What to do next:

Look at other essays:

7.5
band
In many countries, people do not recycle waste materials, such as bottles and newspapers. What are the reasons for this? What could be done to solve this problem
A plastic bottle or a scrambled paper thrown carelessly on the road, how common a sight is this? I am sure each one of us can picture these images in our heads but have we ever thought of the detrimental impact it has on our environment? Every problem has its causes and potential solutions, this essay will highlight some of these in detail.
7.5
band
In some cultures, children are often told that they can achieve anything if they try hard enough. What are the advantages and disadvantages of giving children this message?
In some beliefs, offspring are given a message that if they want to achieve something they must thrive as well as the results they hope. This essay will outline either the advantages or the disadvantages of that statement.
6
band
People think that government should increase the cost of fuel for cars and other vehicles to solve environmental problems. Give your opinion.
Many people argue that one solution to environmental problems would be for governments to raise the price of petrol. While i consider this might be an effective measure, I would argue that there might be other measures with greater impact. If national authorities raised taxes on petrol, this would lead to two environmental issues. Firstly, in terms of private cars, many commuters will have to consider how much they going to spend on their journey to compensate for the extra expense. For instance, governments are required to enhance the city's public transportation, serving many people who choose mass transit instead of their private transport to reduce emissions and give more space for the roads. Secondly, the measures about freight services, many goods will be transported by rail rather than truck, this ideal would bring back a lot of efforts for the city environment and also reduce the greenhouse effect. On the other hand, this could also be a stopgap measure, people who visit the...
6.5
band
Traffic and housing problems could be solved by moving large companies, factories and their employees to the countryside. Do you agree or disagree?
Increased traffic and lack of housing supply are major concerns in many places. By relocating large businesses, including their factories and employees, to rural areas, these issues can be properly addressed. I personally find this idea justifiable; however, at the same time, some other initiatives should be implemented if we expect to solve traffic and housing problems effectively.
8.5
band
You live in a room in college which you share with another student. There are many problems with this arrangement and you find it difficult to work. Write a letter to the accommodation officer at the college. In the letter: describe the situation explain the problems and why is it difficult to work say how you would like the situation resolved
The purpose of writing this letter is to complain about the room and to request assistance in finding a better place for me.

In spite of the advances made in agriculture, many people around the world still go hungry. Why is this the case? What can be done about this problem?

Your opinion

In many countries, people do not recycle waste materials, such as bottles and newspapers. What are the reasons for this? What could be done to solve this problem

In some cultures, children are often told that they can achieve anything if they try hard enough. What are the advantages and disadvantages of giving children this message?

People think that government should increase the cost of fuel for cars and other vehicles to solve environmental problems. Give your opinion.

Traffic and housing problems could be solved by moving large companies, factories and their employees to the countryside. Do you agree or disagree?