There are severe social consequences to housing shortages in cities and only the government can solve these problems. To what extent do you agree or disagree?
Urban
areas
have witnessed a population burst in recent years. This
increased number has made the city
housing areas
insufficient to fulfil the public demand and caused different types of social consequences. Some people
believe that the government
is the only hope to solve this
puzzle and I strongly agree with this
notion.
To support my point of view, I firmly believe that the
uncontrolled and imbalanced urbanization has brought Correct article usage
apply
this
dilemma upon us. Also
, the lack of planning and conciousness
from the planners has made the situation even Correct your spelling
consciousness
worst
. Correct word choice
worse
As a result
, people
of
the below-income range are finding it hard to manage Change preposition
in
a
proper housing. So, it is definitely the Correct article usage
apply
government
, supreme
authority who has the Correct article usage
the supreme
responsibilty
to churn out the solutions. Correct your spelling
responsibility
For example
, if the urban planning unit of the government
shows their creativity and initiates the plans to build a modern, sustainable and effective urban city
area, the problem will be solved in no time.
Explaining another
supporting point to Verb problem
Another
proof
my view, Replace the word
prove
it
is the fact that the poor and homeless Correct pronoun usage
apply
people
choose areas
like a footpath or the sideways of a highway to dwell as
they find no other alternatives. Change preposition
in as
As a result
, there is a chance in
the growth of Change preposition
of
crime
rate of the Correct article usage
the crime
city
and decline
in the proportion of socio-economic equilibrium. Again, Correct article usage
a decline
government
can play a vital role here. To cite an example, the government
can build multi stored
Add a hyphen
multi-stored
appartments
in the Correct your spelling
apartments
apartment
goernment-acquired
lands so that many slum dwellers and Correct your spelling
government-acquired
the
homeless Correct article usage
apply
people
can have their own residence
which will improve not only their lifestyle but Fix the agreement mistake
residences
also
the social consequences caused by housing
shortage.
In conclusion, it is my strong belief that Add an article
the housing
lack
of housing in Correct article usage
the lack
city
areas
have
social consequences and Correct subject-verb agreement
has
it
the Correct pronoun usage
apply
government
can easily tackle this
hassle with proper plans and managements
.Fix the agreement mistake
management
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task response
Ensure a balanced discussion by considering counter-arguments or other perspectives in the essay to enhance task response.
coherence cohesion
Provide more varied cohesive devices to improve coherence and cohesion.
general advice
Check for minor grammar and spelling errors to improve clarity.
task response
The introduction clearly states the writer's position.
coherence cohesion
Each paragraph supports a distinct main idea with relevant examples.
task response
The conclusion effectively summarizes the main points of the essay.
Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
Linking words are very important in your essay.
To score effectively on your IELTS exam, you should make an effort to implement short concise sentences coupled with linking words.
Almost every sentence in your essay should have a linking word of some sort.
In fact, the only sentences that can omit linking words are your background sentence and thesis.
Linking word examples:
- firstly
- secondly
- thirdly
- in additional
- moreover
- also
- for example
- for instance
- therefore
- however
- although
- even though
- despite