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Writing Samples
Band 5.5

Some people believe that online education provides significant benefits, while others think it leads to a loss of important social interactions. Discuss both views and give your opinion.

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Online
education
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 has become increasingly popular, offering benefits in accessibility and flexibility.
However
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, some argue it leads to a lack of essential social interactions.
This
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 essay will examine both advantages and disadvantages before providing an opinion. A key benefit of online
education
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 is its accessibility.
Students
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 from remote areas can attend classes
from
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at
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 top institutions without needing to relocate.
For instance
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, someone in a rural area can access quality
education
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 without high travel costs.
Additionally
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, online learning allows
students
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 to study at their own pace, revisiting recorded lectures to reinforce understanding.
This
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 flexibility is particularly valuable for those with demanding schedules. Despite these benefits, online
education
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 has its drawbacks, particularly the reduction in face-to-face social interaction. In traditional classrooms,
students
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 develop communication and teamwork skills through group projects and discussions, essential for both personal and professional growth.
For example
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, online learners may miss out on activities that foster these skills, potentially impacting their future careers.
Additionally
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, many online
students
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 report feelings of isolation, which can lower motivation and engagement. In conclusion,
while
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 online
education
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 offers advantages like flexibility and accessibility, the lack of in-person interaction can limit social skill development and cause feelings of isolation.
Therefore
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, I believe that
while
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 online learning is beneficial, combining it with occasional in-person activities could offer a more balanced educational experience.

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task achievement
To further improve, consider providing more specific examples or elaborating on existing ones to increase the relevance and richness of your examples.
task achievement
Ensure that your examples are directly supporting your arguments to enhance clarity and impact.
task achievement
Your essay presents a clear and comprehensive response to the task, thoroughly exploring both perspectives.
coherence cohesion
The logical structure of your essay is strong, with a clear introduction and conclusion that effectively frame your arguments.
coherence cohesion
Your main points are well-supported and coherent, contributing to the overall readability and cohesiveness of the essay.

Your opinion

Don’t put your opinion unless you are asked to give it.

If the question asks what you think, you MUST give your opinion to get a good score.

Don’t leave your opinion until the conclusion.

Here are examples of instructions that require you to give your opinion:

...do you agree or disagree?...do you think...?...your opinion...?

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