Research suggests that the majority of criminals who are sent to prison commit crimes when set free. What are the reasons? What can be done to solve the problem?

The inequalities in income, wealth,
opportunities
Correct word choice
and opportunities
show examples
make many people turn to
crime
.
Study
Fix the agreement mistake
Studies
show examples
recommend that the majority of lawbreakers who are sent to
jail
commit more crimes when they
set
Add a missing verb
are set
show examples
to
Fix the infinitive
apply
show examples
free.
This
essay shall discuss causes and solutions and it will
bw
Correct your spelling
be
articulated in
further
paragraphs. To commence with,when offenders are free from prison
punishment
they do more
crime
and
reasons
Correct article usage
the reasons
show examples
for that are following.
Firstly
, in
Add a comma
incarcerate,
show examples
incarcerate
Replace the word
incarceration
show examples
there are other
danger
Replace the word
dangerous
show examples
culprits who encourage them and train them for
more
Add an article
the more
a more
show examples
dangerous
crime
Fix the agreement mistake
crimes
show examples
.
Secondly
, they make unity in
jail
thus
, they can take
revange
Correct your spelling
revenge
and commit
for
Change preposition
apply
show examples
ample
of
Change preposition
apply
show examples
crimes.
Thirdly
,
such
Change preposition
in such
show examples
circumstances prison as
punishment
will not
rehabilitation
Add a missing verb
be rehabilitation
show examples
. To curb the obstacle, government authorities should provide education,
training
Correct word choice
and training
show examples
to
felon
Fix the agreement mistake
felons
show examples
in prison.
Police
Add an article
The police
show examples
force should give work like
cleanning
Correct your spelling
cleaning
, cooking and
help
Wrong verb form
helping
show examples
exoffenders
Correct your spelling
ex-offenders
ex offenders
as a part of lock-up
punishment
.
Moreover
, small lawbreakers should
isolate
Wrong verb form
be isolated
show examples
from
danger
Replace the word
dangerous
show examples
criminals who will
encourge
Correct your spelling
encourage
others to re-offend and aid them
for
Change preposition
in
show examples
crime
Add an article
the crime
a crime
show examples
. To recapitulate, "nobody is criminal by birth
such
cirucumstances
Correct your spelling
circumstances
and the life situation
make
Change the verb form
makes
show examples
them
to
Change the verb form
apply
show examples
do
crime
Add an article
the crime
show examples
." After
free
Add a missing verb
being free
show examples
from
jail
punishment
they are trained and encouraged by other criminals and in behaviour of taking
revange
Correct your spelling
revenge
make
Correct subject-verb agreement
makes
show examples
them
to do
Verb problem
apply
show examples
re-offend. To solve
this
problem,
government
Add an article
the government
show examples
should provide job opportunities
specially
Replace the word
especially
show examples
for
delinquent
Fix the agreement mistake
delinquents
show examples
and provide education in
jail
not to commit any
crime
.
Submitted by kakshpatel16916 on

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coherence cohesion
Ensure that there is clear linkage between your ideas within and between paragraphs. This will improve the logical flow of your essay.
task achievement
Include specific examples to support your points, which would demonstrate a deep understanding of the topic.
coherence cohesion
Focus on organizing your essay clearly; each paragraph should have a specific point with supporting sentences.
task achievement
You have done well to identify and discuss causes and potential solutions to the issue of recidivism.
coherence cohesion
The essay has both an introduction and conclusion, giving it a complete structure.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • Rehabilitation programs
  • Reintegration into society
  • Recidivism
  • Barriers to employment
  • Social stigma
  • Mental health issues
  • Peer influence
  • Inadequate post-release support
  • Counseling
  • Community programs
  • Substance abuse
  • Relapse into addiction
  • Support systems
  • Financial aid
  • Incarceration
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