More and more people are using computers and electric devices to access information, so there is no need for printed books, magazines and newspaper. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

✨ Do you want to improve your IELTS writing?
Using
computers
has played a key role for many
people
to have access to various
information
around the world.
In other words
, these days, more and more
individuals
are using new technology
such
as laptops in order to raise awareness.
This
is why
that
Correct determiner usage
apply
show examples
people
do not have to purchase and use papers so as to get different
information
. I strongly disagree with
this
idea
due to
Change preposition
for
show examples
some reasons. In
this
essay, I will explain my reasons, and
also
I will elaborate on my own view. One of the most significant reasons for my disagreement is that using
computers
can have some serious demerits for
individuals
.
That is
to say, if
people
just use electric devices to get general
information
,
individuals
may face some challenges. Take
eyes
Change the noun form
eye
show examples
problems as an example.
It is clear that
staring
to
Change preposition
at
show examples
the
computers
Change noun form
computer's
show examples
screens can be harmful
for
Change the preposition
to
show examples
Correct article usage
the eyes'
show examples
eyes'
Change noun form
people's eyes
show examples
people
rather than reading paper magazines.
This
is because some
people
might tend to only read newspapers to be informed about the news. Another momentous reason why I disagree with
this
opinion is that some readers might not be compatible with technology.
Otherwise
stated, there are various adults who
not
Add a missing verb
are not
show examples
completely keen on having access to
information
with
computers
.
Although
,
Remove the comma
apply
show examples
it is argued by some that printed
books
may be demolished in the future
due to
technology
Replace the word
technological
show examples
advance
Fix the agreement mistake
advances
show examples
, I personally think reading magazines to be informed can be more practical and demanding for readers.
To conclude
, there is no doubt that using electric devices to gain
information
can be replaced by printed
books
in the near future.
In
Change preposition
From
show examples
my perspective, there is an equal idea between reading
books
with
computers
or
Correct word choice
and
show examples
printed
books
.
As a consequence
,
individuals
are likely to enjoy getting
information
with
Change preposition
from
show examples
printed
books
, as there are a lot of drawbacks
of
Change preposition
to
show examples
using
computers
.
Submitted by TUTOO on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

clarity
Ensure your main points are clear and distilled from any unnecessary complexity. Consider simplifying your language for clarity.
evidence
Provide more specific examples to support your points, which could additionally strengthen your argument.
organization
The essay presents a clear introduction and conclusion, offering a structured approach to the topic.
development
The argument is generally well-developed, showing a strong foundation in addressing both technology influence and the persistence of traditional media.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Topic Vocabulary:
  • Digital revolution
  • Immediate access
  • Interactive content
  • Multimedia elements
  • Enriched learning experience
  • Environmental considerations
  • Deforestation
  • Pollution
  • Tactile experience
  • Cognitive understanding
  • Retention
  • Technological dependency
  • Power outages
  • Remote locations
  • Tangible form
What to do next:
Look at other essays: