Many museums and historical sites are mainly visited by tourists, not local people. Why is this the case? What can be done to attract local people? Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

Many museums and historical sites are mainly visited
international
Change preposition
by international
show examples
visitors
, not native
people
. In my opinion, they
are not interest
Change the verb form
are not interested
are not interesting
show examples
to
Change preposition
in wasting
show examples
waste
time and
money
. Because they
seen
Add the auxiliary verb
saw
have seen
show examples
these
places
before.
On the other hand
,
Firstly
, many native
people
seen
Add the auxiliary verb
saw
have seen
show examples
these
places
before because these
places
are familiar to every native
people
.
For
this
reason,they do not want to
a
Add a missing verb
be a
show examples
waste
of time.
Secondly
, these
places
are famous, and these areas
ticket
prices
very
Add a missing verb
are very
show examples
expensive. Many local
people
Change noun form
people's
show examples
income
low
Add a missing verb
is low
show examples
. They want to save
money
, and they do not agree to
waste
of
Change preposition
apply
show examples
money
in these
places
.
Thirdly
, many local
people
lack
of
Remove the preposition
apply
show examples
knowledge about these
places
who
Correct word choice
and
show examples
are uneducated they do not know about valuable things in these
places
. They can damage museums and historical
places
things. Many local
people
think it is just a
waste
of time. In Bangladesh, 96% of
visitors
are international and 4% of
visitors
are local
people
. Because local
people
not
Add a missing verb
are not
show examples
interested
for
Change preposition
in
show examples
seeing these
places
again. On the
another
Correct quantifier usage
other
show examples
hand, the authorities should
provides
Change the verb form
provide
show examples
discounts on
ticket
Fix the agreement mistake
tickets
show examples
or give free tickets
in
Change preposition
to
show examples
the local public. If
not low
Verb problem
there are no
show examples
ticket
prices, local
people
do not go
these
Change preposition
to these
show examples
places
because they want to save
money
. They dislike to
waste
of
money
in familiar areas. So the government should at least weekly provide discounts on tickets for the local public. And another thing government should train uneducated
people
so that they
could not
Wrong verb form
cannot
show examples
damage these valuable things. In conclusion, many museums and historical sites are mainly visited by
visitors
. Local
people
do not go there . Authorities should less
ticket
prices and should provide
train
Fix the agreement mistake
trains
show examples
of
Change preposition
for
show examples
uneducated
people
.
Submitted by mdtipusultanakhand on

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task response
The essay addresses the task and provides some insights into why local people may not visit historical sites and museums. However, the reasoning could be more developed with additional supporting detail.
coherence and cohesion
Try to present ideas more clearly, ensuring each paragraph has a central theme and is connected logically to others. This will improve the coherence and flow.
structure
The essay includes both an introduction and a conclusion, giving the response a sense of completeness.
support
You mentioned relevant examples such as the statistics from Bangladesh, which adds credibility to your argument.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • cultural heritage
  • tourist attractions
  • interactive exhibits
  • perception
  • civic pride
  • engagement
  • community outreach
  • curate
  • cultural institutions
  • historical significance
  • sustainable tourism
  • resident benefits
  • local patronage
  • preserve
  • educational initiatives
What to do next:
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