Some people say that music is a good way of bringing people of different cultures and ages together. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this opinion?

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Many
people
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claim that it is a good way to attach all ages
people
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who belong to other cultures together through
music
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. There are a number of reasons,
such
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as tone and background effects that drive
people
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to bring them together. I firmly agree with
this
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trend, and
this
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essay will demonstrate it. An outstanding example of
this
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trend is the remarkable implementation of spreading
music
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through the Internet.
People
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from different cultures love
music
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, whether it is a native
culture
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or another
culture
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, which is trending most in recent times.
For example
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, many
people
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use social media, and they listen to a variety of
music
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from different cultures.
However
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, they do not understand the lyrics, they enjoy the tone, and sometimes they are keen to know
this
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trending
music
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's background, which helps them to connect with each other.
Additionally
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, many concerts,
such
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as brand shows, and operas, appear in a certain place. There are numerous
people
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from all ages attend there.
As a result
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, it can be beneficial to know each other, which makes a good relationship among them.
On the other hand
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, it is true that some
music
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has a negative impact on their
culture
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, but most
people
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avoid it. Though many
music
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do not understand their lyrics or language,
people
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love their tone or background effects. It is
also
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a good reason to bind
people
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from another
culture
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.
To conclude
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,
music
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is the better option to connect
people
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with each other who belong to another
culture
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.
Although
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some lyrics of
music
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are unpredictable,
people
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enjoy other elements of
music
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that assist them in bringing together all kinds of ages which I believe.
Submitted by nazmulrafi023 on

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coherence and cohesion
You provided a clear introduction and conclusion that encapsulates the main argument effectively.
coherence and cohesion
Your essay contains a logical structure which is easy to follow, with ideas in paragraphs being connected to the central theme of the essay.
task achievement
You presented a complete response by discussing the role of music in connecting people from different cultures and ages.

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For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • universal language
  • evoke
  • connect
  • diverse audiences
  • cultural exchange
  • generational gaps
  • shared experiences
  • unifying force
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