There is a table showing the numbers of visitors to Ashdown Museum during the year before and the year after it was refurbished and the charts show the result of surveys asking visitors how were pleased during the same two periods.

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The provided table illustrates the numbers of

people

Use synonyms

who visited the Ashdown Museum before the year renovated and the year after. The pie charts demonstrate how visitors were satisfied with their visit over the same 2 years.

Overall

Linking Words

, it is vividly seen that very satisfied

people

Use synonyms

increased significantly, holding the second position after restoration. Unlikely,

people

Use synonyms

who did not like, saw a remarkable plunge and the number of humans "very dissatisfied" rose moderately, accounting for the maximum amount.

To begin

Linking Words

with, in the year before the upgrade, the fractions of dissatisfied and satisfied human beings were the highest among them, stabilising at 40 and 30 respectively.

Furthermore

Linking Words

, very satisfied and dissatisfied humans and the guys who did not answer the survey

Remove the comma

apply

show examples

were differentiated by 5

people

Use synonyms

standing at 15, 10 and 5 correspondingly.

However

Linking Words

, after refurbishment, very dissatisfied human kinds went up to 40, being in the first position,

while

Linking Words

the previous biggest one (dissatisfied) experienced a remarkable downward trend, falling to 15. Very satisfied surged considerably to 35,

whereas

Linking Words

no response and very dissatisfied

people

Use synonyms

had the same level, being at 5.

Submitted by novruzluahmed2007 on Wed Nov 13 2024

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Vocabulary: Replace the words people with synonyms.

▼

Vocabulary: Rephrase the word "numbers of" in your introduction.

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Vocabulary: The word "numbers of" was used 2 times.

▼

6
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
1
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
1
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 9.0

Logical structure

Single idea per paragraph

Introduction & conclusion present

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 7.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 8.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 9.0

Complete response

Suitable writing tone

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

183 words

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There is a table showing the numbers of visitors to Ashdown Museum during the year before and the year after it was refurbished and the charts show the result of surveys asking visitors how were pleased during the same two periods.

Some people believe that it’s important to spend a lot of money on family celebration while others think it’s a waste of money. Discuss both views

Some people say in order to prevent illness and disease, governments should focus on reducing environmental pollution and housing problems. To what extend do you agree or disagree?

Some children spend hours every day on their smartphones. Why is it the case? Do you think this is a positive or negative development?

The leaders of most organisations tend to be older people.However, some argue that younger people tend to make better bosses. To what extent do you agree or disagree?