These days it is much easier for many people to travel to different countries for tourism than in the past. Do the advantages of this development outweigh the disadvantages?
In the
last
few decades
there has been a significant increase in the number of opportunities for international travel, with more transport routes and cheaper fares.
There are undoubtedly benefits flowing from Add a comma
decades,
this
growth in international tourism. People now have a greater awareness of other cultures than was the case even one generation ago. Travelling widely to enjoy such
things as the art, customs and cuisine of different countries used to be the preserve of the wealthy classes. Now even the less well-off have access to them.
There are, however
, drawbacks associated with this
level of mobility. Firstly
, a number of resorts, even whole countries, have so many tourists
that the culture and environment are severely damaged. For example
, traditional crafts are replaced by the manufacturing of cheap trinkets and local singing and dancing are packaged for tourist consumption. Because tourists
stay for only a short time they often don't care if they behave badly or litter the streets. Secondly
, although
the hospitality industry does bring employment, it tends to be precarious because much of it is seasonal, with long periods of the year offering no work. The income from tourism is unevenly distributed, with a small number of big businesses (e.g. property developers) making a lot of money but the majority of people work for low wages as waiters or guides. Related to this
is the fact that money spent by tourists
is seldom retained by the local economy and profits are frequently taken out by multinational corporations. Finally
, international travel adds to greenhouse gases, leading to harmful climate change.
In my view, despite the advantages of travel to both tourists
and host countries, these do not compensate for the damage inflicted on the environment, social structures and individuals by mass tourism.Submitted by ghadeersulami on
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task achievement
Ensure that each point is clearly related back to the thesis statement to strengthen the argument.
task achievement
Use more specific examples to illustrate points more vividly, beyond just mentioning general impacts.
coherence cohesion
Ensure logical progression between the damage to the environment and its subsequent societal impacts.
introduction conclusion present
The essay presents a clear introduction setting up the argument of the benefits versus the drawbacks.
complete response
Ideas are well-developed with a good balance of advantages and disadvantages, leading to a strong conclusion that clearly states the writer's stance.
logical structure
The logical structuring of arguments makes it easy to follow the writer's reasoning from one point to the next.
Fully explain your ideas
To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).
For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:
- Paragraph 1 - Introduction
- Sentence 1 - Background statement
- Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
- Sentence 3 - Thesis
- Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
- Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
- Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
- Sentence 2 - Example
- Sentence 3 - Discussion
- Sentence 4 - Conclusion
- Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
- Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
- Sentence 2 - Example
- Sentence 3 - Discussion
- Sentence 4 - Conclusion
- Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
- Sentence 1 - Summary
- Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
- Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation
Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.
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