IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 5

Logging of the rain forests is a serious problem and it may lead to the extiction of animal life and human life. Do you agree or disagree?

Deforestation is becoming
awidely
Correct your spelling
a widely
widely
 popular for numerous reasons and assets.
However
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, it is becoming the cause of various issues for not only
humankinds
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humankind
humankind's
 but
also
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 for animals. I fully agree with
this
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 statement.
Although
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drawbacks
Correct article usage
the drawbacks
show examples
 of
this
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 practice may not be instant but would be devastating for the whole planet.
Firstly
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, chopping off forests may be beneficial
temporary
Change the word
temporarily
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.
However
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, damage
due to
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this
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 is permanent and scary for the upcoming generations.
As forests
Correct word choice
Forests
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 are considered as lungs of the earth.
For instance
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, if a number of
forest
Change to a plural noun
forests
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 are cleared, there will be
decrease
Correct article usage
a decrease
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 in
quantity
Add an article
the quantity
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 of oxygen, more depletion of
ozone
Correct article usage
the ozone
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 layer eventually
increase
Correct article usage
an increase
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 in
Correct article usage
the temerature
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temerature
Correct your spelling
temperature
 of the earth, melting glaciers and increasing water
level
Fix the agreement mistake
levels
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 resulting into vanishing various countries.
Hence
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, leading to
an
Correct article usage
the
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 end of
Correct article usage
the humans
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humans
Fix the agreement mistake
human
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 and
animals
Change the noun form
animal
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 era.
Secondly
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, there may be many advantages of
this
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 practice to people. Since wood obtained is used to satisfy
day to day
Add a hyphen
day-to-day
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 needs
and
Correct word choice
apply
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cleared spaces witness
formation
Correct article usage
the formation
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 of buildings, stadiums and airports which
further
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 add up
into
Change preposition
to
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 the economy of the country.
For example
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, country X is collapsing various
woodland
Fix the agreement mistake
woodlands
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to
Change preposition
apply
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for its development and growth,
such
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 as building more and more
researching
Replace the word
research
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 centres and entertainment pursuits for people and
tourist
Fix the agreement mistake
tourists
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 to raise GDP.
Thus
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, it can be seen destruction of jungles is proving magnificent for many.
To conclude
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,
it is clear that
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may
Correct your spelling
maybe
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 be destruction of
planations
Correct your spelling
plantations
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 is actually a big no for the planet, even though mass is getting some positive results
for
Change preposition
in
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short
Add an article
the short
a short
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 term.
Therefore
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, cutting down wood can be considered a serious problem for all living beings.

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task achievement
Ensure to provide a more balanced view by addressing both the negative and positive impacts of deforestation more thoroughly.
coherence cohesion
Strengthen the logical flow between ideas and paragraphs for better coherence.
grammar and lexis
Proofread your essay to correct minor grammatical errors and improve sentence structure.
task achievement
Clear stance at the beginning of the essay.
task achievement
Appropriate use of examples to support points.
coherence cohesion
Presence of introduction and conclusion which frame the essay.
Topic Vocabulary:
  • deforestation
  • biodiversity
  • sustainable
  • ecosystem
  • carbon emissions
  • indigenous communities
  • sustainable forest management
  • desertification
  • ecological balance
  • water cycle
  • carbon dioxide absorption
  • habitat destruction
  • environmental degradation
  • climate change impact
  • economic losses
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