Some people are often influenced in their behaviors by others in the same age group. Some argue that peer pressure is important while others feel it has distinct disadvantages. Do disadvantages of peer pressure outweigh the advantages ?
There is a controversial perspective heating a debate over
peer
pressure
. While
some claim that peer
pressure
plays a significant role in people’s lives, the opposite makes a statement that it has clear drawbacks. In my opinion, the disadvantages of peer
pressure
cannot overshadow its advantages.
Without a shadow of a doubt, peer
pressure
can play a significant role in personal growth among young people. And the
explanation for Correct word choice
The
this
could be that when surrounded by high-achieving peers, individuals may feel inspired to set higher goals for themselves. This
can lead to positive outcomes, such
as improved academic performance, participation in healthy activities
, and the adoption of beneficial habits. For instance
, students may be encouraged to study harder or engage in extracurricular activities
due to
the positive influence of their peers. Therefore
, peer
pressure
is important for self improvement
.
Add a hyphen
self-improvement
While
the advantages of peer
pressure
are widely acknowledged, its counterparts still linger. This
is probably because peer
pressure
can lead to the adoption of harmful behaviors
Change the spelling
behaviours
such
as smoking, drinking, drug use and reckless driving. To be more specific, a student starts drinking and smoking at parties to fit in with a new group of friends, leading to declining grades and risky behaviors
like reckless driving after drinking. Change the spelling
behaviours
This
shift illustrates how peer
pressure
can push adolescents towards harmful activities
. Hence
, the disadvantages of peer
pressure
can be substantial.
In conclusion, while
peer
pressure
can influence positive behaviors and motivate individuals toward personal growth, the potential of
negative outcomes is substantial Change preposition
for
such
as the risk of engaging in harmful activities
.Submitted by hominhtrang995 on
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coherence cohesion
Your essay has a clear structure with an introduction, body paragraphs, and a conclusion. However, the conclusion could be a bit more detailed to effectively summarize your argument and reinforce the main points.
task achievement
You provide both advantages and disadvantages of peer pressure and clearly state your opinion. To enhance your task achievement, consider expanding on examples and providing more detailed explanations to support your points.
task achievement
You effectively present a balanced view of peer pressure by discussing both its advantages and disadvantages.
coherence cohesion
Your essay has a coherent structure and flows logically from one idea to the next, making it easy to follow your argument.
Answer the 'Advantages and Disadvantages' topic
IELTS advantages and disadvantages questions normally give you a statement and ask you to comment on the advantages and disadvantages of that statement.
Answer structure for the type of essay
- Introduction
- Body paragraph 1 – advantages
- Body paragraph 2 – disadvantages
- Conclusion
Examples to start your body paragraph:
- The main advantage is...
- The disadvantage of this...
- The main benefit...
- Despite these advantages...
- One possible drawback...
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