IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 6.5

The graph shows the demand for energy and the energy available for fossil fuels in Freedonia from 1985 to 2005. Write a report for a university lecturer describing the information shown below.

The graph shows the demand for energy and the energy available for fossil fuels in Freedonia from 1985 to 2005. Write a report for a university lecturer describing the information shown below.
the line graph illustrates the
energy
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demand
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 and
availability
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 in Freedonia between 1985 and 2005.
Overall
Linking Words
, at
glance
Add an article
a glance
show examples
, the
energy
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demand
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 fluctuated during the period,
and
Correct word choice
apply
show examples
reaching
the
Correct article usage
a
show examples
 peak in 1995 and declining after that. the trend of
availability
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 of
energy
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 in Freedonia fluctuated and for the
ending
Add a comma
ending,
show examples
 the
availability
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reach
Wrong verb form
reached
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 the highest peak by 2005. In 1985, the
energy
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availability
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 in Freedonia was approximately almost four
energy
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units
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,
besides
Linking Words
 that
in
Change preposition
apply
show examples
ten years after the
availability
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 of
energy
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continously
Correct your spelling
continuously
increase
Wrong verb form
increased
show examples
 in 1995
around
Change preposition
to around
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 seven
energy
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units
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.
However
Linking Words
, after the peak, the
availability
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 of
energy
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 faced
decrease
Correct article usage
a decrease
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around
Change preposition
of around
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 two
energy
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units
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 by 2000
,
Remove the comma
apply
show examples
 and remained stable at the of the period
around
Change preposition
at around
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 seven
energy
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units
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.
In contrast
Linking Words
, the
energy
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demand
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 was approximately five
energy
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units
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 in 1985, and experienced
Correct article usage
a
show examples
decrease in 1990
about
Change preposition
to about
show examples
 two
energy
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units
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. In
Correct your spelling
addition
addtion
Correct your spelling
addition
, the
demand
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 still remained stable at
this
Linking Words
 by 1995, and the
demand
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of
Change preposition
for
show examples
energy
Use synonyms
 increased and still
increase
Wrong verb form
increased
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 until the end of
period
Add an article
the period
show examples
 around seven
Correct your spelling
energy
energi
Correct your spelling
energy
units
Use synonyms

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Sentences: Add more complex sentences.
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Vocabulary: Replace the words energy, demand, availability, units with synonyms.
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Vocabulary: The word "decrease" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "increase" was used 3 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "remained" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "stable" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "fluctuated" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "approximately" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "around" was used 4 times.
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