Some people think that competition at work, at school and in daily life is a good thing. Others believe that we should try to cooperate more, rather than competing against each other. Discuss both these views and give yourown opinion.

#people #competition #work #school #life #yourown

✨ Do you want to improve your IELTS writing?

Individuals believe that competing with

others

Use synonyms

has a lot of advantages, but

others

Use synonyms

think coopering is more important. In my view, I agree with the latter. I tend to support the view that

people

Use synonyms

should try their best to cooperate with

others

Use synonyms

To begin

Linking Words

with, cooperation can help

people

Use synonyms

get better consequences and be more efficient most of the time since they can separate the tasks among different

people

Use synonyms

depending on what they are good at.

For example

Linking Words

, when a group of students needs to finish a presentation, the person who is talented in public speech can handle the

last

Linking Words

performance easily, compared with the

others

Use synonyms

who spend a lot of time

practicing

Change the spelling

practising

show examples

, the group can save time to concentrate on refining the other part. Another key consideration should be that it can cultivate cooperation ability, which is valued by most employers since a well-coordinated person can adjust new environment more quickly. Understandably, there are several reasons why

people

Use synonyms

might argue that

competition

Use synonyms

has advantages. The primary reason they may point out is that through competing with

others

Use synonyms

people

Use synonyms

realize their shortages effectively can lead to self-improvement to enhance competitiveness.

In addition

Linking Words

, it is the most efficient way to push ourselves to improve which could help to get rewards,

due to

Linking Words

competition

Use synonyms

can stimulate the desire to win, leading

people

Use synonyms

to try their best to work or study.

for instance

Linking Words

, at work,

competition

Use synonyms

for promotions and higher compensation packages.

However

Linking Words

, as far as I am concerned, over-compete may lead to influence on public health because

people

Use synonyms

stay in a high-pressure situation, only putting attention on their shortages and ignoring their strengths, leading to a lack of confidence.

Overall

Linking Words

while

Linking Words

in some ways it may seem reasonable that

competition

Use synonyms

can help

people

Use synonyms

develop abilities and skills to become better, I personally believe that cooperation can reach the same outcome

besides

Linking Words

people

Use synonyms

are

Wrong verb form

being

show examples

more relaxed in

this

Linking Words

period.

Submitted by yihualuo525 on Thu Nov 14 2024

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

relevant specific examples

Expand on the examples to provide a clearer link between your main points and real-life applications. This will strengthen your argument and make it more compelling.

logical structure

While your paragraphs are generally well-structured, try to make your transitions between paragraphs smoother. This will improve the overall flow of your essay.

supported main points

Work on supporting each main point with additional evidence or examples where possible. This will help to solidify your arguments.

introduction conclusion present

Your essay includes a clear introduction and conclusion, which helps in framing your arguments succinctly.

complete response

You provided a complete response to the task by discussing both views and giving your own opinion, which is crucial for task achievement.

logical structure

The essay showcases logical structuring in your argument presentation, making your general stance easy to follow for the reader.

Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

Examples make your writing easier to understand by illustrating points more effectively.

Examples, if used properly, not only help you get higher marks for ‘Task Response’ but also for ‘Coherence’.

When giving examples it is best to put them after your main idea or topic sentence. They can be used in the middle of supporting sentences or they can be used to start a new sentence. There is no rule for where exactly to give examples in essays, logically they would come after your main idea/topic sentence or just after a supporting sentence.

Linking words for giving examples:

for example
for instance
to illustrate this
to give a clear example
such as
namely
to illustrate
take, for example

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

11
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
3
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
2
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 7.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 7.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 6.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

5 paragraphs

316 words

🚀 Prepare for IELTS writing section today!

Unlimited Task 1 & Task 2 checks
Practice with essays, charts, and letters.
Personalized suggestions & mistake analysis
Spot every mistake and boost your score.
Topic ideas & vocabulary helpers
Expand your ideas and use the right words.
Progress tracking
Watch your writing improve with every practice.

What to do next:

Look at other essays:

7.5
band
In many countries governments are living in new technology to deal with the public. Why is this happening? Do you think this is an appropriate use of government money?
Recently, authorities worldwide have been refining new technology to better serve the people. Personally, I think that this is a good use of public funds and that the cause for this move is the rising number of offenders.
6
band
In the future, nobody will buy printed newspapers or books because they will be able to read everything online without paying. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this opinion?
In the modern world, a variety of people use electronic devices for reading newspapers or books. That’s why people don’t need to buy these kinds of things; it’s considered a debatable topic nowadays. Specifically, this topic even grows more significantly when it’s comes to decreasing earnings for this section in groceries. Some people claim that all of us ought to buy printed newspapers or books, especially the older generations; however, others believe that we don’t need to buy something because we can easily get information on social media or our electronic devices. I concur with the second debatable topic for several reasons.
8
band
You need a website for your business, and you would like to ask your friend to build it. Write a letter to your friend. In your letter Include a brief description of your business Explain what you would like to have on the website Provide some ideas on the use of images on the website.
I hope you are in good condition. I am writing in order to ask a favour from you.
6.5
band
Many nations seek to raise their standard of life through economic growth, yet doing so often results in the loss of significant societal values. Do you believe that there are more benefits than drawbacks to economic development?
Economic development is a crucial factor in improving the living standard of people in many countries. However, this development often comes at the cost of losing important social values. In this essay, I will discuss whether the advantages of economic development outweigh the disadvantages.
7
band
Childood obesity is an increasing problem in Australia as many as two thirds of children are now obese. Schools have a responsilbility to monitor what their students eat and the amount of exercise they do. To what extend do you agree to this statement?
in the present world, the number of children who are obese is increasing tremendously in Australia which is rather over a quarter of children's rate. Schools are in charge of observing ethier students' diets and the amount of their physical activities. I readily agree that it is schools' duty to prevent children from eating unhealthy food and being inactive.

Some people think that competition at work, at school and in daily life is a good thing. Others believe that we should try to cooperate more, rather than competing against each other. Discuss both these views and give yourown opinion.

Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

In many countries governments are living in new technology to deal with the public. Why is this happening? Do you think this is an appropriate use of government money?

In the future, nobody will buy printed newspapers or books because they will be able to read everything online without paying. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this opinion?

You need a website for your business, and you would like to ask your friend to build it. Write a letter to your friend. In your letter Include a brief description of your business Explain what you would like to have on the website Provide some ideas on the use of images on the website.

Many nations seek to raise their standard of life through economic growth, yet doing so often results in the loss of significant societal values. Do you believe that there are more benefits than drawbacks to economic development?

Childood obesity is an increasing problem in Australia as many as two thirds of children are now obese. Schools have a responsilbility to monitor what their students eat and the amount of exercise they do. To what extend do you agree to this statement?