Today more and more tourist are visiting places where conditions are difficult, such as the Sahara desert or the Antarctica. What are the benefits and disadvantages for tourists who visit such places?
Nowadays
lot
of tourists call on such
as places where shape
are arduous Fix the agreement mistake
shapes
such
as the Sahara
desert or the
Correct article usage
apply
Antarctica
In my opinion
lot
of advantages side
especially these destinations offer an incredible sense Add a comma
side,
adventure
as tourists and get Change preposition
of adventure
explore
environments far from in Fix the infinitive
to explore
Sahara
desert or the
Correct article usage
apply
Antarctica
and
tourists Correct word choice
apply
visiting
Wrong verb form
visit
lot
of countries especially Change the article
a lot
their
learn about Correct pronoun usage
apply
ecosystem
and wildlife and Fix the agreement mistake
ecosystems
unique
to things environment and In my Correct article usage
the unique
opinion
these is comfortable for me but these not have a
Remove the article
apply
drink
water but Change the verb form
drinking
Antarctica
have a lot
of ice these is very emmitsion
moments for me there are advantages side for me
Correct your spelling
emission
Correct your spelling
However
Howaver
Correct your spelling
However
Correct your spelling
therefore
thefore
in my Correct your spelling
therefore
opinion
should be not forget
to take drink water when goes there Change the verb form
not forget
such
as Sahara
after that these areas have a extreme weather conditions
Correct the article-noun agreement
an extreme weather condition
extreme weather conditions
such
as extreme heat in Sahara
and freezing temperature
in Fix the agreement mistake
temperatures
Antarctica
In my opinion
don't go to two Correct your spelling
place
places
palce
Correct your spelling
place
such
as Antarctica
or Sahara
desert
In conclusion
Add a comma
conclusion,
traveling
to Change the spelling
travelling
such
destinations can be incredibly rewarding for adventure but there are also
necessary to look at the climate thereSubmitted by Writing9 on
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task response
Your essay would benefit from adding more specific examples. Consider describing a unique experience in the Sahara or Antarctica to make your points more vivid.
coherence cohesion
Work on improving the logical flow of your sentences to make the essay easier to follow. Try using linking words and phrases like "thus," "however," and "as a result."
task response
Aim to clarify your ideas further. Instead of saying "especially their learn about ecosystem and wildlife," try explaining how tourists engage with these aspects specifically.
coherence cohesion
Your introduction and conclusion provide a clear framework for your essay. You have introduced the topic effectively and wrapped up your thoughts in the conclusion.
task response
You address both benefits and disadvantages, which indicates a balanced approach to the task.
Fully explain your ideas
To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).
For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:
- Paragraph 1 - Introduction
- Sentence 1 - Background statement
- Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
- Sentence 3 - Thesis
- Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
- Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
- Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
- Sentence 2 - Example
- Sentence 3 - Discussion
- Sentence 4 - Conclusion
- Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
- Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
- Sentence 2 - Example
- Sentence 3 - Discussion
- Sentence 4 - Conclusion
- Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
- Sentence 1 - Summary
- Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
- Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation
Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.
Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+
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