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Writing Samples
Band 6

the diagram bilow shows how a biofuel called ethanol is produced. summirise the information by selecting mainfutures and make comparisons where it is relevant

the diagram bilow shows how a biofuel called ethanol is produced. summirise the information by selecting mainfutures and make comparisons where it is relevant
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The diagram below illustrates the cycle of
ethanol
Use synonyms
 production, which is commonly used as a
biofuel
Use synonyms
.
According to
Linking Words
 the given data,
biofuel
Use synonyms
 production's start and end points depend on the gas called
carbon
Use synonyms
dioxide
Use synonyms
.
Firstly
Linking Words
,
ethanol
Use synonyms
 production starts with the photosynthesis process. During the process,
plants
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 and trees grow using sunlight and
carbon
Use synonyms
dioxide
Use synonyms
, and they produce oxygen and carbohydrates.
Secondly
Linking Words
, grown vegetation is harvested and transported to a pre-processing area, where
they
Correct pronoun usage
it
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get
Correct subject-verb agreement
gets
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 ground by special machinery. After the pre-processing,
plants
Use synonyms
 are turned into cellulose which is
then
Linking Words
 transferred to the processing area. As follows in the processing period, cellulose turns into sugars
due to
Linking Words
 chemical reactions, which are used as food for microbes.
Moreover
Linking Words
, microbes consume cellulose sugars and produce a gas, namely
ethanol
Use synonyms
. In most cases,
ethanol
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 is used as a
biofuel
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 for cars, trucks, and planes,
therefore
Linking Words
 transports use
ethanol
Use synonyms
 as a fuel and they produce
carbon
Use synonyms
dioxide
Use synonyms
 fumes, which are used in photosynthesis again. Taking everything into consideration, naturally,
plants
Use synonyms
 use
carbon
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dioxide
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 as a
food growing
Add a hyphen
food-growing
show examples
 source, and
plants
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 are turned into
ethanol
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 by biochemical processes. in the same way,
ethanol
Use synonyms
 is used as a
biofuel
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, and it later produces
carbon
Use synonyms
dioxide
Use synonyms
, which is
renewable
Correct article usage
a renewable
show examples
 energy cycle source.

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Basic structure: Change the third paragraph.
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Basic structure: Change the fourth paragraph.
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Basic structure: Change the fifth paragraph.
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Vocabulary: Replace the words ethanol, biofuel, carbon, dioxide, plants with synonyms.
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Vocabulary: Only 4 basic words for charts were used.
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Vocabulary: Use several vocabularies to present the data in the third paragraph.
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Vocabulary: Use several vocabularies to present the data in the fourth paragraph.
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Vocabulary: Use several vocabularies to present the data in the fifth paragraph.
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