Some people argue that immigrants should adopt the local culture when immigrating to a new country. An alternative view is that they can adapt to a new environment by establishing a minority community. Discuss these two views and give your opinion.

#people #immigrants #culture #country #alternative #environment #minority #community #two

A group of individuals assert that the new settlers must assimilate into the other

culture

while

others debate that they should retain their own background. I acknowledge that both

the

Correct article usage

apply

show examples

comments can be brought to work simultaneously.

This

essay will discuss each of these perspectives

along with

my viewpoint in subsequent paragraphs. To commence with the former idea, merging into a

culture

Add a missing verb

is a

show examples

significant value as it can eliminate the chances of cultural controversies against

new comers

Correct your spelling

newcomers

show examples

as the existing population will not suffer from fear of

loosing

Replace the word

losing

show examples

dominance in their own country.

Moreover

, the immigrants can

also

discover some other traditions existing on the same land by instilling

the

Correct article usage

apply

show examples

knowledge about the history of additional

culture

Fix the agreement mistake

cultures

show examples

into themselves.

Thus

this

sort of practice can serve to nurture connections between variant groups of people. On the controversial side, the

later

Correct your spelling

latter

show examples

motion is

also

commendable as preserving their own

culture

by establishing

minority

Correct article usage

a minority

show examples

community can foster their confidence and

this

can help them to bolster their dedication towards their ambition of moving to a new region. Not only

thsi

Correct your spelling

this

, but it can be a positive way to embody

individual’s

Correct article usage

an individual’s

show examples

own

culture

in order to remain distant from getting a

culture

shock.

Therefore

this

opinion can be proved

Change preposition

on a

show examples

Correct article usage

the

show examples

right track to make their

culture

Immortal. In conclusion

Change preposition

apply

show examples

Correct pronoun usage

apply

show examples

this

, immigrants should focus

to bridge

Change preposition

on bridging

show examples

a society that embraces both

the

Correct article usage

apply

show examples

principles can thrive by not

having

Verb problem

being

show examples

Correct article usage

apply

show examples

brainwash

Replace the word

brainwashed

show examples

regarding their own

culture

and respecting the background of others at the same time.

Submitted by ranjot01jan on Thu Nov 14 2024

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task response

Consider using more specific examples and illustrations to better support your arguments.

coherence cohesion

At times, your connections between ideas can be made smoother to enhance flow. Use more transitive elements and linking phrases.

coherence cohesion

You have provided a clear introduction and conclusion that frame your essay effectively.

task response

The ideas presented are relevant and cover both perspectives of the discussion.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

Paragraph 1 - Introduction

Sentence 1 - Background statement
Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
Sentence 3 - Thesis
Sentence 4 - Outline sentence

Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 4 - Conclusion

Sentence 1 - Summary
Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

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7Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
1Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
19Grammar mistakes
 

4 paragraphs

250 words

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 6.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

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Topic Vocabulary:

integrate
social harmony
cultural conflicts
economic opportunities
local market needs
cultural identity
emotional support
preserve traditions
social cohesion
unity
stable and harmonious society
economic impact
participate
multiculturalism
cultural landscape
diverse perspectives
innovation
global connections
sense of identity
mental health
well-being

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Some people argue that immigrants should adopt the local culture when immigrating to a new country. An alternative view is that they can adapt to a new environment by establishing a minority community. Discuss these two views and give your opinion.

Fully explain your ideas

Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

In order to become financially responsible adults, children should learn to manage their own money at young age. Do you agree or disagree?

some people believe that students should learn science subjects at schools while others believe that other subjects like history is also beneficial for them discuss both views

Since not all children have a natural talent for language, not all of them should start learning a foreign language in primary school. Do you agree or disagree?

Universities and colleges are now offering qualifications through distance learning from the Internet rather than teachers in the classroom. Do you think the advantages of this development outweigh the disadvantages? 4.5

9.Full-time university students should spend a lot of time studying, but it is essential to be involved in other activities. To what extent do you agree or disagree?