NOWADAYS ,more and more people prefer to wear fashionable clothes . Is this good or bad trend ? .
These days , most
of
Change preposition
apply
the
Correct article usage
apply
people
are giving more preference to wear
trendy attires as compared to Wrong verb form
wearing
past
. Actually , it is a positive Correct article usage
the past
trend
, but there is one
negetive
Correct your spelling
negative
effects
of Change to a singular noun
effect
following
this
trend
. Both the
aspects will be explained in the upcoming paragraphs before reaching Correct article usage
apply
to
a conclusion .
Change preposition
apply
One
of the main reasons of
why Change preposition
apply
people
are
indulge themselves in Unnecessary verb
apply
this
trend
is that they want to cope up themselves with the entire world . Because , mostly individuals in the developed countries ,love to wear designer clothes
acoording
to Correct your spelling
according
trend
. If people
from developing countries visit to
their country , so , they can easily adopt their dressing sense to fit themselves Remove the preposition
apply
in to
their culture in Join the words
into
a
less time . Correct article usage
apply
Otherwise
, they feel themselves as backdated .Thus
, this
is the reason people
trying
to involve themselves Wrong verb form
try
to wear
fancy Change preposition
in wearing
clothes
.
Additionally
, by wearing fashionable clothes
, the person can take a break from daily and mudane
lifestyle . They will not only feel themselves going with Correct your spelling
mundane
newly
Change the word
new
trend
Fix the agreement mistake
trends
,
but Remove the comma
apply
also
easily get rid of their peer pressure . For instances
, Fix the agreement mistake
instance
on
Change preposition
in
a
workplace , everyone is obliged to wear a set dress code , so after Correct article usage
the
an
week they are totally bored with the same Change the article
a
clothes
. So, by adapting
the habit of wearing fancy Correct your spelling
adopting
clothes
they can feel fresh and they will feel more comfortable in their friend circle .
However
, while
adapting the trend
of wearing fashionable clothes
especially
the children , who are moving abroad are totally forgetting their culture and traditions in terms of clothing sense . They just want to imitate the Add the comma(s)
, especially
western
culture . Capitalize word
Western
Thus
, in this
way
they are totally disconnected Add a comma
way,
with
their traditional attires . So , Change preposition
from
this
is one
of the negetive
Correct your spelling
negative
effect
of Change to a plural noun
effects
adapting
trendy Correct your spelling
adopting
clothes
.
In conclusion , Although
there are numerous benefits of wearing fashionable clothes
as one
cope
with the world Change the verb form
copes
along
with
they can get a break from Change preposition
apply
boring
lifestyle Correct article usage
a boring
but
its Remove the conjunction
apply
negetive
effects can not be neglected .Correct your spelling
negative
Submitted by hk356645 on
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Coherence and Cohesion
Ensure that each paragraph clearly connects to the next, maintaining a seamless flow of ideas throughout the essay. This can be improved by using transitional phrases consistently.
Task Achievement
When discussing negative aspects, ensure to provide balanced arguments and detailed examples to strengthen the response further.
General
Pay attention to small grammatical inaccuracies such as articles usage and word choice, and aim to correct them for a more polished essay.
Coherence and Cohesion
The essay provides a clear introduction and conclusion, which helps in framing the argument effectively.
Task Achievement
The ideas presented in the essay are relevant to the topic and capture different aspects of fashionable clothing trends.
Task Achievement
The essay attempts to present both positive and negative sides of the trend, showcasing a balanced viewpoint.
Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Examples make your writing easier to understand by illustrating points more effectively.
Examples, if used properly, not only help you get higher marks for ‘Task Response’ but also for ‘Coherence’.
When giving examples it is best to put them after your main idea or topic sentence. They can be used in the middle of supporting sentences or they can be used to start a new sentence. There is no rule for where exactly to give examples in essays, logically they would come after your main idea/topic sentence or just after a supporting sentence.
Linking words for giving examples:
- for example
- for instance
- to illustrate this
- to give a clear example
- such as
- namely
- to illustrate
- take, for example