An increasing number of people are choosing to have cosmetic surgery in order to improve their appearance. Why do people have operations to change the way they look? Do you think this is a positive or negative development?

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World technology
is increase
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is increasing
show examples
all types of growth. nowadays
cosmetic
Fix the agreement mistake
cosmetics
show examples
is
Correct subject-verb agreement
are
show examples
one of the best technological
development
Fix the agreement mistake
developments
show examples
in the world. It has been increasing
to
Change preposition
in
show examples
all nations. many people
is
Change the verb form
are
show examples
doing cosmetic
surgery
for
verious purpouse
Correct your spelling
various purposes
. It has positive and
negetive
Correct your spelling
negative
development. I will explain
about
Change preposition
apply
show examples
it next paragraph.
Firstly
, people are like many
thinks
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things
show examples
. those are, they are
chanching
Correct your spelling
changing
appearence
Correct your spelling
appearance
for lots of needs. somebody
are
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is
show examples
like
Change preposition
apply
show examples
modelling, acting,
changeing
Correct your spelling
changing
hanging
there
Correct your spelling
their
show examples
face and body
for earning
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to earn
show examples
money
to
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apply
show examples
them
therefore
Add the comma(s)
, therefore
show examples
, they are
doing
Verb problem
having
show examples
surgery
. some people
change
there
Correct your spelling
their
show examples
feeling
Replace the word
feelings
show examples
from cosmetic
surgery
. It is a very vital cause for earning money.
For example
. many old actors
Verb problem
have
show examples
are
Change the verb form
are changing
are changed
show examples
change
there
Replace the word
their
show examples
appearance, many fat women
are
Verb problem
have
show examples
change
Wrong verb form
changed
show examples
there less fat.
moreover
Capitalize word
Moreover
show examples
,
sombody
Correct your spelling
somebody
Correct subject-verb agreement
is
show examples
are
Change the verb form
are changed
are changing
show examples
change
women to men, men to women.
Moreover
,
In
Change preposition
apply
show examples
this
surgery
will be affecting to them.
when
Capitalize word
When
show examples
they
did
Wrong verb form
do
show examples
this
surgery
they have to
use
unusful
Correct your spelling
unuseful
unusual
and effecting
chamical
Correct your spelling
chemical
It is not
sutable
Correct your spelling
suitable
for
Correct article usage
the futur
show examples
futur
Correct your spelling
future
. some time they can
died
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die
show examples
.
other
Correct quantifier usage
Another
show examples
think
Correct your spelling
thing
show examples
is when
the
Correct your spelling
they
show examples
doing
Wrong verb form
do
show examples
this
plastic
surgery
they will be changing human
feeling
Fix the agreement mistake
feelings
show examples
. It is very not
accepteble
Correct your spelling
acceptable
for us. indeed,
some time
Replace the word
sometimes
show examples
make some
illegel
Correct your spelling
illegal
activities.
For example
;
last
year one of
pastic
Correct article usage
a pastic
show examples
surgery
person died because he
use
Wrong verb form
used
show examples
chemichals, when somebody
chenge
Correct your spelling
changes
girl
Correct article usage
a girl
show examples
to
boy
Add an article
the boy
a boy
show examples
it is not acceptable
for
Change preposition
in
show examples
socities
Correct your spelling
society
. In
Fix the agreement mistake
Conclusion
show examples
Conclusions
Fix the agreement mistake
Conclusion
show examples
, Plastic
surgery
is
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
a
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
one of
Correct article usage
the moden
show examples
Correct article usage
the moden
show examples
Correct your spelling
modern
moden
Correct your spelling
modern
technology
Fix the agreement mistake
technologies
show examples
in the world. when we
use
this
technology we can get more
benifits
Correct your spelling
benefits
in future. it has positive and
negetive
Correct your spelling
negative
advantage
Fix the agreement mistake
advantages
show examples
. in my
openion
Correct your spelling
opinion
, when
i
Change the capitalization
I
show examples
use
this
Correct determiner usage
these
show examples
usfull
Correct your spelling
useful
needs we can get more
benifits
Correct your spelling
benefits
otherwise
we have to face many problems.

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task achievement
Ensure each paragraph has a clear purpose and structure, with a clear topic sentence and supporting sentences.
task achievement
Provide more specific examples and evidence to support your points.
coherence cohesion
Work on organizing your main ideas more clearly, ensuring they are connected logically.
coherence cohesion
Try to develop your ideas more thoroughly, providing more in-depth explanations and examples.
task achievement
You have addressed both the positive and negative aspects of cosmetic surgery, which shows a balanced view.
coherence cohesion
The essay includes an introduction and a conclusion, which helps the reader follow your argument.

Use a variety of complex and simple sentences

You should use complex sentences in your writing, but it does not mean that you should try to make all of our sentences complex.

‘Complex’ sentences are not actually very complex; they are just two or more simple sentences put together. Putting them together makes the essay more coherent and cohesive.

Examples:

I really want to study but I’m too tired.

I wore a warm coat because the weather was cold.

If action is not taken soon on climate change, global warming will get worse.

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