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Writing Samples
Band 8

The bar chart below shows the percentage of Australian men and women in different age groups who did regular physical activity in 2010. Summarize the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

The bar chart below shows the percentage of Australian men and women in different age groups who did regular physical activity in 2010. Summarize the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.
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The bar chart compares the
percentage
Use synonyms
 of Australian
males
Use synonyms
 and
females
Use synonyms
 who regularly participated in physical
activity
Use synonyms
 in 2010.
Overall
Linking Words
, the proportion of
females
Use synonyms
 engaging in physical
activity
Use synonyms
 showed a slight upward trend across
age
Use synonyms
 groups,
whereas
Linking Words
 the
participation
Use synonyms
 rate for
males
Use synonyms
 fluctuated more significantly. For
females
Use synonyms
, the highest
participation
Use synonyms
 rate was observed in the 55-64
age
Use synonyms
group
Use synonyms
, where just over 50% were regularly active.
This
Linking Words
 was a noticeable peak compared to younger
age
Use synonyms
 groups.
However
Linking Words
, after the
age
Use synonyms
 of 64, the
percentage
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 of
females
Use synonyms
 involved in physical
activity
Use synonyms
 declined slightly, remaining just above 50%.
In contrast
Linking Words
,
males
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 exhibited a different pattern. The highest level of
participation
Use synonyms
 was seen in the 15-24
age
Use synonyms
group
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, where over 50% of
males
Use synonyms
 engaged in regular physical
activity
Use synonyms
.
Participation
Use synonyms
 dropped significantly for those in the 35-44
age
Use synonyms
group
Use synonyms
, which recorded the lowest
percentage
Use synonyms
 of active
males
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. Interestingly, the
percentage
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 of
males
Use synonyms
 participating in physical
activity
Use synonyms
 rose again in the 65 and over
group
Use synonyms
, reaching approximately 48%.

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Vocabulary: Replace the words percentage, males, females, activity, age, participation, group with synonyms.
▼
Vocabulary: Rephrase the word "percentage" in your introduction.
▼
Vocabulary: The word "compares" was used 2 times.
▼
Vocabulary: The word "percentage" was used 4 times.
▼
Vocabulary: The word "significantly" was used 2 times.
▼
Vocabulary: The word "slight" was used 2 times.
▼
Topic Vocabulary:
  • Bar chart
  • Percentage
  • Regular physical activity
  • Participation
  • Age group
  • Trend
  • Significant
  • Notable
  • Gender gap
  • Comparative analysis
  • Consistent
  • Decline
  • Progressive
  • Conversely
  • Motivations
  • Barriers
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