Many people believe that zoos have no purpose in today*s world and should be closed.What problems do zoos bring? What are the alternatives to zoos if they are closed?

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Nowadays, mass

Correct subject-verb agreement

are

show examples

pondering on disadvantages caused by animal parks and a lot of believe these should be shut down because of the problems other living beings face

due to

Linking Words

it.

Like many

Correct word choice

Many

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creatures are actually losing their instinctive abilities

about

Change preposition

apply

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which I will discuss in upcoming paragraphs

futher

Correct your spelling

further

followed by

another ways

Replace the adjective

another way

other ways

show examples

to animal parks if these get closed in

Correct article usage

the forseeable

show examples

forseeable

Correct your spelling

foreseeable

future.

Firstly

Linking Words

, various living beings have their own way of living.

However

Linking Words

, when they are brought to zoos, they become dependable on humans for not only their food

Remove the comma

apply

show examples

but for their safety as well.

Hence

Linking Words

, there are chances of them

to lose

Change the verb form

losing

show examples

their inherited skills of attacking predator, ability to make their survival in terrain and tough weather conditions and getting food for their survival.

For instance

Linking Words

, Lions and tigers are

animal

Change the noun form

animals

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who find their own nourishment

according to

Linking Words

their body needs and keep going around the jungle running, saving themselves from

predator

Fix the agreement mistake

predators

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. Obviously, it is not possible in animal parks for

animal

Fix the agreement mistake

animals

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to live as their life should be and

thus

Linking Words

they will definitely fail to keep innate things in them.

Secondly

Linking Words

, if by any chance zoological places

closes

Change the verb form

show examples

soon in future,

then

Linking Words

there

numerous

Add a missing verb

are numerous

show examples

alternatives to keep forest creatures in way better than

traditional

Correct article usage

the traditional

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way of keeping them. Having natural conservation areas, which may be

largers

Correct your spelling

larger

large

, open but still restricted for any kind of hunting and logging of trees. Where wild beings can live by themselves without any interference

Change preposition

from

show examples

humankind.

For example

Linking Words

, In India, there is

natural

Correct article usage

a natural

show examples

conservation park, where several endangered and other fauna are closely monitored

with out

Correct your spelling

without

show examples

any

interfernce

Correct your spelling

interference

interferences

and

Correct word choice

show examples

altering anything so that they can get

most

Correct article usage

the most

show examples

out of

natural

Add an article

the natural

show examples

setting.

To conclude

Linking Words

, Zoos are having

negative

Add an article

a negative

show examples

effect on the upcoming generations of fauna

however

Linking Words

there

different

Add a missing verb

are different

show examples

startegy

Correct your spelling

strategies

like conservatives that are proving more logical and beneficial for creatures.

preetsimran0123Fri Nov 15 2024

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task response

Try to develop your ideas more fully with relevant examples and explanations to strengthen your arguments. Additionally, work on ensuring clarity throughout your essay.

coherence cohesion

Focus on creating clear connections between your paragraphs and ideas. This can be achieved by using linking words or phrases and ensuring each paragraph transitions smoothly to the next.

introduction conclusion

The essay presents a clear introduction and conclusion, which positively frames the main ideas and summarizes your stance on the topic well.

task response

The essay addresses both the problems zoos bring and potential alternatives, demonstrating a completion of the task.

Answer the 'Problem and Solution' topic

Problem-and-solution essays fall naturally into two parts, the first describing and exploring the problem, the second setting out the solution or solutions.

You essay structure should look something like this:

Introduction
Body paragraph 1 – Problems
Body paragraph 2 – Solutions
Conclusion

Examples to start your body paragraph:

One of the first problems of the...
Another problem that needs to be considered...
A possible solution to this problem would be...
One immediate practical solution is to...

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11
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
0
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
26
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 6.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

307 words

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Many people believe that zoos have no purpose in today*s world and should be closed.What problems do zoos bring? What are the alternatives to zoos if they are closed?

Answer the 'Problem and Solution' topic

Some people feel that the private lives of celebrities should not be openly shared by the media. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

Some people think that employers should not care about the way their employees dress because what matters is the quality of their work. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

As transport and accommodation problems are increasing in many cities, some Governments are encouraging businesses to move the rural area. Do you think the advantages outweigh to disadvantages?

Some people think that the teenage years are the happiest time of most people’s lives. Others think that adult life brings more happiness, in spite of greater responsibility. Discuss both views and give your own opinion.

in many countries, people are now living longer than ever before. some people say an aging population creates problems for governments. other people think there are benefits if society has more elderly people.