The young can get easily influenced by the internet. What could be the reasons for this? What can be done to exercise more control over their use of the internet. Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

#internet #exercise #control

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It is true that teenagers get influenced easily by the

Internet

. I believe

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apply

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people who get manipulated by the

Internet

are not just young people, but

also

adults.

However

, even though we all get fooled by

this

technology, adults still can distinguish what to believe or not. They tend to have fixed ideas about things in general because they have more

experiences

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experience

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than younger ones. When I was young, I used to believe what the media said as well and I didn't even realise that those could be fake news or posts.

Now

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Now,

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know, after many years, that I can not trust everything that I read on the

Internet

Furthermore

, there

are

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too much information. It is hard to know what is real. To be honest, taking their mobiles will be the fastest track to tackle

this

problem. But we all know that it is unrealistic because young kids have

their

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the

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rights

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right

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to know what they want to know as well.

Therefore

, parents' and teachers' roles are very crucial to lead them in the right direction. First of all, they should try to reduce the amount of time they spend on social media when they can. I used to feel forced when my phone was taken during classes. But it was actually quite

efficent

Correct your spelling

efficient

to focus on my study and learn

someting

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something

genuienly

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genuinely

Also

, these instructors should educate them with correct data, based on books and documents.

Then

, they will be able to become more wise when selecting information. In conclusion, the

Internet

can affect every

individuals

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individual

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. It is impossible not to use it but, I think, there are still ways to teach our kids in a better way.

Submitted by dob.jeong on Sat Nov 16 2024

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relevant specific examples

To improve your essay, try to give more specific examples or anecdotes that directly relate to the main points you have discussed. This will help to strengthen your argument and make it more relatable to the reader.

coherence cohesion

Make sure to use varied sentence structures to maintain the reader's interest and demonstrate your language proficiency. This can improve the overall coherence of your essay.

task achievement

The essay provides a complete response to the question, effectively addressing both reasons why the young are influenced by the Internet and measures to control their usage.

coherence cohesion

The introduction and conclusion are clearly present and well-structured, providing a good start and end to the essay.

Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

Examples make your writing easier to understand by illustrating points more effectively.

Examples, if used properly, not only help you get higher marks for ‘Task Response’ but also for ‘Coherence’.

When giving examples it is best to put them after your main idea or topic sentence. They can be used in the middle of supporting sentences or they can be used to start a new sentence. There is no rule for where exactly to give examples in essays, logically they would come after your main idea/topic sentence or just after a supporting sentence.

Linking words for giving examples:

for example
for instance
to illustrate this
to give a clear example
such as
namely
to illustrate
take, for example

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6
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
1
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
11
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 6.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

280 words

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The young can get easily influenced by the internet. What could be the reasons for this? What can be done to exercise more control over their use of the internet. Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

In many countries today, if people want to find work, they have to move away from their friends and their families. Do you think the advantages of this development outweigh the disadvantages? Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from own knowledge or experience.

Some pp believe that public buildings should be moved out ò the city to promote citizen's well being and better economic growing, while some argue that the planning will cause more harm than good. Discuss both views and give your own opinion.

Some people think most crimes are the result of circumstances like poverty and other social problems. Others believe that they are caused by people who are bad in nature. Discuss both views and give your opinion.

In the modern era, it is easy to sell, buy and work with others through the internet. But others are against it. Do you think this is a positive trend or a negative trend?