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Writing Samples
Band 4.5

Modern technology has a great impact on our environment. Some say that people should adopt a simple lifestyle to solve this problem, while others argue that the technology itself should provide a solution. Discuss both views and give your own opinion.

#technology #impact #environment #say #people #lifestyle
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The influence of modern
technology
Use synonyms
 on the environment is a pressing concern between those advocating for a simpler
lifestyle
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 and
who
Correct determiner usage
those who
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 believe that technological
advancements
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 should provide a solution. Several effective ways can tackle environmental issues.
For example
Linking Words
, some of the approaches can be sustainable transportation or waste management like recycling. Protecting natural habitats can improve
resilience
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the resilience
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 of the environment.
Conversely
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,
advancements
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 in modern
technology
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 can effectively address environmental challenges. Innovations
such
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 as wind energy, electric vehicles and some technologies have the potential to reduce pollution or environmental degradation.
Furthermore
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,
technology
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 can help in observing ecological health.
Moreover
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, smart technologies like technological resources can help households reduce their energy waste. In my view,
this
Linking Words
 approach that integrates both a simpler
lifestyle
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 and technological
advancements
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 is significant for addressing environmental issues. In conclusion, a simple
lifestyle
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 can prevent environmental damage, and the impact of modern
technology
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 on our environment presents a complex challenge that requires varied responses. Both adopting a simpler
lifestyle
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 and taking advantage of technological
advancements
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 are necessary to create meaningful and beneficial change and provide the health of our planet.
Submitted by i.nureddinn on

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task achievement
Expand more on both lifestyle and technology strategies to strengthen your argument.
task achievement
Develop some points further to provide depth and clarity.
task achievement
Include more specific examples to illustrate your points effectively.
coherence cohesion
Ensure each paragraph links coherently to the next for better cohesiveness.
coherence cohesion
Add more detailed support for your main points to increase cohesiveness.
coherence cohesion
The introduction and conclusion clearly set out and summarize the main points of the essay.
task achievement
The essay presents a balanced discussion of both viewpoints.
coherence cohesion
The structure is logical with an introduction, two body paragraphs, and a conclusion, which aids clarity.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

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