It is important for people to take risks, bothh in teir professional lives and their personal lives. Do yo think the advantages of taking risks outweigh the disadvantages
The journey of
the
life Correct article usage
apply
force
people to take Correct subject-verb agreement
forces
risks
and hard discision
; Correct your spelling
decision
decisions
However
, there are sometimes you
the choice to choose between Correct pronoun usage
apply
risky
Correct article usage
a risky
choise
or Correct your spelling
choice
choose
save
one. Wrong verb form
saving
In addition
, its
argued that the Correct your spelling
it's
advantades
of taking Correct your spelling
advantages
risks
outweight
the disadvantages. In my opinion, I think that the advantages of Correct your spelling
outweigh
taking
Correct your spelling
making
hard
Correct article usage
a hard
discision
are more than Correct your spelling
decision
decisions
doesnt
take it because Correct your spelling
doesn't
challanges promot
your Correct your spelling
challenges promote
joutney
to Correct your spelling
journey
next
level. Correct article usage
the next
Although
they have many risks
.
To bigun
with, Correct your spelling
begin
difficults
that we take enhance us, in spite of Correct your spelling
difficulties
they
Correct word choice
whether they
successed
or Correct your spelling
succeeded
succeed
failed
. Wrong verb form
fail
This
is because we will leave our comfort zone to achieve our goals, and we are goinng
to adapt Correct your spelling
going
with
any Change preposition
to
challange
we face. Correct your spelling
challenge
In addition
, we can't improve our level without having challenges eathier
it's professional or personal. Correct your spelling
either
For instance
, recent
study by Add an article
a recent
University
of Prince Sultan (PSU) has shown that 70% Correct article usage
the University
from
people Change preposition
of
who
Correct pronoun usage
apply
preffer
taking Correct your spelling
prefer
difficults
Correct your spelling
difficult
difficulties
than
Change preposition
over
who
don't Correct pronoun usage
those who
are
better Verb problem
have
and
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apply
professioanl
and personal Correct your spelling
professional
live
.
Replace the word
lives
However
, we have not forget
that taking Change the verb form
forgotten
risks
without awareness about
Change preposition
of
will
happen Correct pronoun usage
what will
this
is Correct pronoun usage
apply
Correct article usage
an unrelistic
unrelistic
choice. For Correct your spelling
unrealistic
this
reseans
, in some Correct your spelling
reason
situations
we Add a comma
situations,
cant
take the Correct your spelling
can't
challange
if we Correct your spelling
challenge
will
go to Verb problem
apply
the
zero. Correct article usage
apply
Furthermore
, some people have family
Fix the agreement mistake
families
thay
Correct your spelling
they
that
have
take care Add the particle
have to
about
them, in Change preposition
of
this
situation we reduces
the Change the verb form
reduce
risks
because you are not only
person who will affected. Staying Add an article
the only
in
your level Change preposition
on
better
than Add a missing verb
is better
lossing
Correct your spelling
losing
every thing
, so count the steps that you take before walking onto the Correct your spelling
everything
sterr
.
In conclusion, Correct your spelling
street
risks
is
Change the verb form
are
crucail
to Correct your spelling
crucial
improve
your situation and Wrong verb form
improving
it
Correct pronoun usage
they
outweight
the negatives. Correct your spelling
outweigh
outweighs
Although
if you have a family or a big responsibility you have to take care Correct word choice
However
from
Change preposition
of
drobing
big Correct your spelling
dropping
drob
. Correct your spelling
drop
drops
Furthermore
, study your ability very well and always try to leave your comfort zone to be better day by day.Submitted by abdallah550603 on
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Coherence and Cohesion
Make sure your introduction clearly states your main argument or position and outlines the points you'll discuss.
Task Achievement
Develop each main point in its own paragraph and provide specific examples to support your ideas.
Coherence and Cohesion
Use transitional phrases to better connect your ideas between and within paragraphs, improving the logical flow.
Task Achievement
Your essay reflects an understanding that taking risks can lead to personal and professional development.
Coherence and Cohesion
The conclusion reiterates the main points, aiming to create a balanced view between risks and responsibilities.
Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Examples make your writing easier to understand by illustrating points more effectively.
Examples, if used properly, not only help you get higher marks for ‘Task Response’ but also for ‘Coherence’.
When giving examples it is best to put them after your main idea or topic sentence. They can be used in the middle of supporting sentences or they can be used to start a new sentence. There is no rule for where exactly to give examples in essays, logically they would come after your main idea/topic sentence or just after a supporting sentence.
Linking words for giving examples:
- for example
- for instance
- to illustrate this
- to give a clear example
- such as
- namely
- to illustrate
- take, for example