Young people should choose the jobs that they want. Young people should be more realistic and think more about their future. Discuss both view & give your opinion.
Job
is the most important thing in our life. Everybody would like to choose their future career with their interests
.
I agree that,
everyone should choose their future Remove the comma
apply
profession
by themselves. Although
everyone can choose their career, choosing a job
is the most difficult part of life. Today young people have a good opportunity to make their careers. While
youngsters choose their jobs according to
their interests
, they can get the best results in the future. For example
, some people select their profession
without their interests
, and they cannot work hard and earn more money because they don’t have any motivation and they cannot get on well with their boss. For
this
reason, youngsters should select their profession
with their interests
.
Occupation is not a game, therefore
choosing a job
we should be much more careful and realistic. For instance
, While
choosing a profession
we should check salary and colleagues. Because If our colleagues were friendly and our salary was higher, it is possible to arouse interest for us.However
When we choose a job
that we don’t want, we cannot get a good result, therefore
we should take the occupation that we want and is realistic.
In conclusion, I believe that, if people choose the jobs that they want they’ll get the best results, and I tend to be free to opt for a career.Submitted by makemoneyizzy16 on
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task achievement
Ensure your main points are elaborated with more specific examples to enhance clarity.
task achievement
Provide a clearer distinction between differing views and your own stance.
coherence cohesion
Use more complex sentence structures to improve cohesion and flow between paragraphs.
coherence cohesion
You have introduced the topic and provided a reasonable conclusion.
task achievement
Your essay displays a clear understanding of the topic and task.
coherence cohesion
You have attempted to connect ideas with transitional phrases.
Your opinion
Don’t put your opinion unless you are asked to give it.
If the question asks what you think, you MUST give your opinion to get a good score.
Don’t leave your opinion until the conclusion.
Here are examples of instructions that require you to give your opinion:
...do you agree or disagree?...do you think...?...your opinion...?
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